Date: Thu, 23 May 1996 07:00:49 -0500 From: Robbi Egersdorf -- [ From: Robbi Egersdorf * EMC.Ver #2.5.02 ] -- Here's my second attempt at fanfic. I got such a good response from the first that I decided to keep going. I have so much to express. This piece is pre-ATA and pre-LK and contain no spoilers. Thanks to Arletta Asbury as a beta reader that had the patience to finish. Disclaimers: Niether the FK concept or the characters are mine. I have just borrowed them for a time. The situations and certain other characters are of my imagination. Any resemblance to persons living or dead was not intended. A Little Taste of Happiness Part 1 by Robbi Egersdorf >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> "I'm not going to let you weasel out of this one, Nick. You're going to be there, like it or not. It will be a very special night for the Captain." Natalie turned from her computer terminal to see the look on his face. She knew that he had come to her in the hope she would act as his alibi. "You need to get out with people more often. It's part of what being *human* is. " He threw up his hands in surrender. "All right. I'll go as long as you come as my date." and he smiled his innocent smile. So that was his plan. She laughed "I wouldn't miss this for the world. Do you have your speech written?" She raised an eyebrow in playful mischief knowing full well he didn't. "I was hoping you could help me with it. Come over to my place this morning and we'll work on it together. I'm desperate." He grimaced. "Sure," she laughed, "I think I've got a few good ideas that might help you out." He put on his biggest grin and kissed Natalie on the cheek. "I knew you would come through for me." Nat couldn't help but laugh at how quickly this 800 year old vampire could look so much like a little boy. "Come on now, get or I'll never have this done in time. Go on." "I'm outta here. Don't forget now. I'll be waiting." The door closed behind him and the room fell silent again. She turned back to the computer screen and shook her head. As Nick walked to his car he started to whistle some silly little tune that was caught in his head. Something he had heard on the radio. Just as he reached to open his door, a familiar buzzing went through him. He stiffened . "Lacroix." and turned to see his maker. He was dressed in all black, a turtleneck with the swordpin at the neck. "Lovely night for flying, Nicholas. You should try it." "I'm on duty." He replied with an impatient tone "Oh, yes. I forgot. You and your silly little mortal duty. I swear, Nicholas, the things you treat as important I can't understand. These silly mortal games are nothing to us." "Don't include me in your *us*." He snapped. "Really Nicholas, these things are just specks in time. Why does it matter at all? Mortals grow old, then they grow older and they *die*." "After nearly 800 years I long for the mundane, the ordinary, the mortal." "*You* are anything but ordinary, my dear boy. In fact you are quite extraordinary. I made you that way. I'm afraid you will never find happiness in being ordinary." His statement was punctuated by a sudden whoosh and he was gone. "Just Lacroix come to remind me I'll never find happiness. I almost had it. ..once." He voiced to the uncaring, cool night air. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ New York 1961 Nicholas walked down a dark street, lit only by the weak street lamps whose spheres of influence were so small as to make them of little use to the mortal. He was making his way to his flat after his shift as a night patrolman. The snow had been falling for the last hour or so and was just beginning to cover everything with white. The flakes resembled so many white insects in the act of hurling themselves to the earth. He stopped to buy a newspaper from the corner newsstand, folded it and tucked it under his arm. The early morning air had a crisp, clean feel to it. The night had been long and he was ready to drain a couple of bottles from his fridge and retire for the day. The thought enticed and called to him. He was not paying attention to where he was going and a woman walked into his path, apparently not seeing him either. She had been carrying two quarts of milk in glass bottles. These were jostled together, breaking the glass and spraying the entire contents of the sticky liquid everywhere, drenching the pair of strangers." The woman appeared to be in her mid twenties and was wearing a white nurse's uniform. "Oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't see you coming." She tried in vain to brush the milk from his uniform. "Do you have far to go?" "Not far. I live about ten blocks north of here." She looked up into his face, smiled an embarrassed smile, a crimson blush kissed her cheeks. "You'll catch your death long before then. Come in and I'll dry your clothes." Nick glanced at the sky and noticed it was beginning to lighten. He had just enough time to safely make it home without having blisters burned into his skin by the sun. "I think I..." "I insist. You have no choice in the matter." She stopped and laughed, "I don't even know your name." "It's Nicholas Forrester. Pleased to meet you." and he held out a hand for a handshake. The mysterious woman grabbed the extended hand and started up the stairs of her building. "Nice to know you, Nicholas. Now let's get inside before we both freeze to death." He had no choice but to follow the red haired woman who had his arm. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Toronto 1996 He walked up to Tracy who was intently surveying her computer screen. Nick slapped the papers down on her desk. His partner was so startled she jumped , letting out a little squeal. Nick couldn't help but laugh, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to sneak up on you like that. Are you having any luck with the Arlus case?" Tracy looked at Nick, her heart pounding in her chest. "No, I'm finding a dead end at every turn." "Your not going to like these test results either." He moved around to his side of the desk and sat down. "Natalie's come up empty handed too. All the DNA samples she got, were damaged. She's runnning PCR boosts on them now in order to see if she can salvage any of them." "That puts us back at square one, doesn't it?" "Afraid so." Tracy rubbed her eyes. "I've been staring at this computer screen all night and now I've gone crosseyed. I've got to get some sleep. I thought police work was going to be exciting. All I've done is sit and stare at this stupid computer all night long." She stood up and put on her jacket that had been hung over the back of her chair. "I don't know about you, but I'm calling it quits." "I think I'll hang around here a while longer. I've got a few things I want to check out. See you tonight." He focused his attention on the folder that lay in front of him, opened it and started to dial the phone. Henry Sanchez drifted over and sat on the corner of Nick's desk, waiting for him to finish. "Yeah....Yeah. I'll have to get back to you on that one...You see what you can do...ummm...Okay....Bye." Nick looked up to see Henry's bright shining face. "Your just the person I need to talk to." Henry chimed. "I'm all ears." Nick said, with rather exaggerated sarcasm that totally missed it's mark. "I've got to know if you're going to make it to the you-know-what next week. I need to know if I can count on you.." "Yeah, I'll be there. Nat's got me cornered." "Great. Oh, do you have your speech ready." "What is it with you guys? Don't you trust me!" "I'll take that as a no. Is it going to be ready by Saturday night?" "It'll be ready. I'm going to work on it this morning after work." "Great. Great." He leaned over and slapped the other officer on the back. Nick's eyes went wide with surprise. "See you later, buddy." Unphased by the hostility in his stare, Henry walked away. Nick leaned forward and put his head in his hand in give-me-patients gesture . end part 1 Robbi Knightie With Dark Tendencies You must give in, you must give in. A game that you can't win, the hunger (FK CD "the Hunger") egersdor@magicnet.com A Little Taste of Happiness Part 2 by Robbi Egersdorf >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> "Come on, Nick. I know you can do better than 'He's a great guy'." "I'm grasping at straws, okay. My mind is a total blank on this." He pinched his fingers to the bridge of his nose. "I think we ought to call it quits. I'm beat. Two hours at this and we have nothing I can use." She walked up to him and put her hand on his chest. "You'll come up with something." He enfolded her hand in his and pulling it up to his lips, placed a gentle kiss there, then let go. "I've got to go anyway. I'll see you." "Yeah, see you tonight." He was too wound up to sleep. After locking the door on Natalie's departure, he strolled over to the fridge and took out a full bottle of steer blood. Nick pulled the cork out with his teeth and downed a big swig. His mind was definitely not on Captain Reese, nor had it been all morning. It was miles away in New York on a cold and snowy early morning in 1961 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ New York 1961 "You don't even know who I am. For all you know, I could be a depraved killer." The statement had been meant in scare his hostess, the word truer then she would ever know. Nick was sitting, curled up on the couch in a yellow fluffy robe. The woman was in the other room, washing out his clothes. "I know your somebody who didn't get angry when I drenched them in milk. Besides, you have a face that I can't help but trust." She walked into the living room and began hanging his clothes over the radiator. "It's not totally unheard of for a single woman to get killed by a stranger that she invited into her home. Crime is running rampant in the city. I know, I'm a police officer." "Are you always so full of gloom and doom. I prefer to look for the good in everyone I meet." Nick sat the cup of hot chocolate on the end table next to him, untouched. It had been pressed into his hands by his hostess, under protest. He had learned her name was Stephanie Marshall. She liked to be called 'Stevie' by her friends. The woman was a newly graduated RN and had been working at the local hospital for the last 3 months. He marvelled how full of life this woman was. Her hair was red and fiery like the sun. It was long and pulled back in a bun at the back of her head. She stood by the window in the rays of the early morning sun, wearing a dark green pair of slacks and a lighter green blouse. The color set off the red of her hair perfectly. Her green eyes seemed to laugh as she talked. She shone like her own sun in the middle of a dark night. Stevie reminded him of his sister, so full of life and the wonder of it. Fleur had been likewise inquisitive and anxious to taste all the joys of life. "There is one problem with me staying here." He walked over to her as she was arranging his clothes. He was careful to avoid the strengthening sunlight that was now streaming in the window. "What kind of problem is that?" She turned, a look of concern on her face. "Well...I have a severe allergy to the sun. You see that's why I work at night. It's already too late for me to go home now." "Is that all? You have to come up with something better than that. I have a spare room with a bed, if you don't mind the clutter. You see, I use it as a storage room. I can give you an extra sheet to put over the window. It will shut out a little more sunlight. I have to do that in my room so I can sleep during the day. I've worked the night shift now for three months and I don't think I'll ever get used to it. I mean, sleeping during the day while the sun is shining. How do you do it?" She made her way to the hall closet and pulled out a heavy, plain white sheet. "Thanks." He took her offering. "I can't remember having to *adjust*. It's just the way it's always been." Though he did miss the sunshine on his skin, the warmth and the life it represented. "I could make us some breakfast if you would like." She was trying to stall him anyway she could. It had been ever so lonely since moving to this big lonely city. The thought of having to spend another day alone in this bleak town had prompted her to almost force this strange young man into her home and into her life. She was starved for the company of anyone. "No thanks. I'm fine. I couldn't eat anything right now anyway." He put his hand up to cover his mouth as he yawned. The hunger burned in him. There would be nothing to blunt it until the sun once again left the sky and he could make his way to his apartment and his supply of bottled blood. He had toyed with the idea of covering up all exposed skin and braving the way home. There was no good reason to take the risk, besides he found himself enjoying this woman's company. He took her hand and squeezed it. It was so warm against his cool skin. "Thanks, I really appreciate this. You are too kind to this stranger. Now , if you'll show me to my room..." "No. Wait....I was hoping we could talk." Her eyes mirrored her loneliness and her desperation for company. Nick smiled at her. He, too was feeling the keen pangs of loneliness. "Sure, why not. I would love to sit and visit." They chatted most of the day of work and other things. Nick found her so easy to talk to, the words just flowed. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Toronto 1996 What had triggered her memory earlier, he could not quite tell. He just enjoyed them. Nick had been tinkering the keys of his piano as the memory of her run through his mind. He really needed his rest. Getting up, he closed the cover of the piano and made his way up the stairs and to his bed. ********************* That night he met Tracy at the station door. "Come on, let's roll. We have a possible homicide. At first they thought it was a suicide -a woman jumper - then someone came forward and said she was pushed." "You're really on the ball tonight, Trace." "Yeah, it's that extra cup of coffee I had before work. Does it to me every time." She led the way out the door They drove up to an apartment building. The usual patrol cars were there with their flashing blue and red lights that acted as silent sentinels, drawing all curiosity seekers to them. They seemed to say, 'Here lies human misery'. They entered the alley and made their way to the still form of a young woman that lay on the cold ground, her limbs twisted unnaturally. "She was definitely still alive when she came down." Natalie stood up from the body and greeted the approaching detectives. Nick looked down at the corpse as it lay in a pool of it's own blood. Quickly, he averted his eyes to avoid temptation. Grabbing a uniformed officer as he walked by, he inquired. "Have we found anyone who knew this woman?" The officer pointed over to an older, silver haired lady who was talking to another uniform. The pair of Detectives walked over and flashed their badges. "I'm detective Vetter and this is Detective Knight. We understand you knew the deceased." "Yes, I was here landlady. She rented an apartment on the second floor - 214." Knight looked at the row of windows that appeared to be the second floor. "Is there anyway we can get in, see if she left anything behind, any clues?" "I have a master key." She fished in her purse and handed it to the Detective. "I'm going up to see what I can find." Nick turned and left Tracy to question the landlady. end part 2 Robbi Knightie With Dark Tendencies You must give in, you must give in. A game that you can't win, the hunger (FK CD "the Hunger") egersdor@magiclink.com A Little Taste of Happiness Part 3 by Robbi Egersdorf >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> (Scene continuous with part 2) Nick took a couple of the officer's that were milling about and entered the apartment. The door had been forced and the lock broken. Everything was turned inside out with cushions slashed, drawers turned out, and things thrown out of closets and cupboards. The place had been thoroughly searched . It could be argued that it was pure vandalism, but Nick went with his best instinct, someone was looking for something and the woman down on the pavement had given her life for it. He gave the place a quick once over and found nothing obvious. He left the other officer's to finish with the detail work and went to see what Tracy had found. "Our witness was just coming home after work and heard a commotion on the roof. She looked up and saw someone looking over the edge as the victim fell. The victim's name was Julie Barnes. No 'next of' yet, but she does have a roommate by the name of Jamie Marshall. She works at the all-night diner down the street, nightshift. She's there now." "Looks like somebody went through their apartment looking for something. They're checking for prints right now. Keep nosing around here. See what you can come up with. I'm going to talk with this Jamie Marshall and see if she can give us anything." He drove up in front of the all-night cafe and double checked the address with the one Tracy had given him. From the description he had been given, the woman was thin, in her mid-thirties and had short, curly red hair. "Should be easy to spot." He whispered to himself. Nick walked in the front door and recognized her right off. She had just come out of the kitchen with her arms full of serving dishes. Walking up to her, he flashed his badge. "Nick Knight, Metro Homicide. I need to talk to you Miss Marshall." Jamie took one look at the Detective's face and dropped the dishes. It took the waitress a few seconds to come out of the shock and realize what was happening. She walked over to Nick, took his shoulder and reached out to touch his face. "I can't believe it. Father... I mean you look just like him. I mean... oh, your not old enough to be him of course, but you are the spitting image of him, at least from pictures. I never did met him." Nick looked closer at the woman and saw Stevie's laughing eyes gazing back at him. She began to blush with embarrassment and all he could see was Stevie as she tried to brush the spilled milk from his clothes. Marshall? Could it be? "Your mother... is she Stephanie Marshall?" "Yes. Yes, that's my mother." "Where is she now? How is she?" A sadness came into Jamie's face. "She died last spring of breast cancer." Nick's heart fell. "I'm sorry to hear that. She was a beautiful woman. I mean... I have pictures too." His head reeled. Of all the places for Stevie's daughter to be, she was right here in Toronto! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ His mind wandered back to New York 1961: They had gotten to know each other quite well over the weeks since their first encounter. She had fled to New York to escape a relationship with an abusive boyfriend. Nick had made it a habit of walking her to and from work every night and morning. He felt protective of her and worried what might happen in the night to this innocent Florence Nightingale, having seen first hand how cruel the night could be. One morning she had invited him in because there was some important news she had to tell him. "Why so serious?" He sat down on the couch as she stood at the window watching the darkness that enveloped the world around her. "Nick, what I have to say is very difficult for me to tell you. Please don't make it any harder by trying to make small talk." Stevie turned from the window and looked Nick straight in the eye. She took a deep breath and walked over, sitting next to him on her sofa. Reaching over and taking his hand, she placed it over her abdomen. "I'm pregnant." her face was blank in preparation for whatever Nick's reaction would be. The hope of his acceptance and the fear of his rejection was suspended for one awful instant that seemed, to her to stretch forever. He was stunned. His head whirled. When his tongue finally found words he whispered. "A baby. You're having a baby." Nick was both shocked and delighted by the news. The knowledge only proved to heighten his protective instincts for her and her unborn child. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Toronto 1996 Nick reached over to touch Jamie's hair, remembering the feel and the smell of her mother. He had loved the fiery quality of her hair and how it had shone when the moon reflected in it. His mind snapped back to the present and the sad news he had come to tell. "We need to talk. Can you get someone to take over?" "Sure, Sarah can handle it. It's slow now, anyway. Just find a table and sit down. I'll be there as soon as I can get this mopped up. I'll just tell Sarah where I'll be." Nick took a booth and thoughtfully stared out the window, waiting for Jamie to join him. When she was finished, she slid into the booth across from him. "What did you say your name was?" "Nick Knight." "My father's name was Nick." He nodded. "I have some bad news, Miss Marshall. Your roommate, Julie Barnes was killed tonight. She fell from the roof of your apartment building." "Julie, dead? It can't be. She was going to make us breakfast when I got home this morning. She can't be dead." Putting her face down into her hands, she began to cry for the loss of her friend. Nick went over to her side of the booth and sat next to her, putting his arm about her. She leaned into him, lay her head on his shoulder and began to weep. He stroked her hair all the while aware of the growing need to shelter and protect this young woman. After the torrent had passed and she had calmed, Nick continued with what he had to say. "I have a few more things that I need to ask you about your roommate. I think it would be best if we went down to the station for that. " She looked at him with her reddened eyes. "Ah, okay. Let me tell Sarah I've got to go and I'll be right back." He waited for her at the door, escorted her to his car and slid into the driver's seat after opening the door for Jamie and making sure she was safely seated. They drove to the station in silence as she watched the sights of the dark night streets of Toronto flash by her window. Nick kept looking over at her as he drove. After they had arrived and entered the building he volunteered, "You bear a striking resemblance to your mother... from pictures." She looked at him with a sad smile. "We've got to get together to swap stories." "I'd like that. This way Miss Marshall." He led Jamie to one of the interview rooms. Taking the seat opposite Jamie, he started the tape machine recording. "We believe that your roommate was murdered." "Murdered!" "We have a witness who says she saw someone push her from the roof. Do you know of anyone who would want to hurt her?" "No, She didn't have any enemies that I know of. Julie was a sweet girl. I don't believe anyone would want to kill her." "How about boyfriends?" "Donald Ellinger. He's out of town now. She just got a letter from him today. I have it right here in my purse. I picked up the mail this afternoon and forgot to give it to her." She handed the letter over to Nick and he slipped it into the breast pocket of his jacket. "Guess she'll never get it now." "Was there anything either you or she had that was important enough for someone to kill for?" "No." ******************** "Captain, I believe Julie Barnes' roommate may be in danger. I want to put her under protective custody. She can stay at my place till we see where this thing is going." "Okay. If you think that it's necessary." "Thanks, Cap." end part 3 Robbi Knightie With Dark Tendencies You must give in, you must give in. A game that you can't win, the hunger (FK CD "the Hunger") egersdor@magiclink.com A Little Taste of Happiness Part 4 by Robbi Egersdorf >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> "Jamie, I'm going to have you come stay with me. They turned your apartment inside out looking for something. You most likely would be in danger if you went back there before we had a chance to find out who did this to Julie. We have no idea whether or not they found what they were looking for. I don't want you to be the next target" "Yes, all right. That will give us an opportunity to get to know each other ." She picked up her coat and draped it over her arm. "We just might be brother and sister. Half, anyway." Picking her purse up off the table, she followed Nick out of the room. "Yes, wouldn't that be something?" Nick knew what their relationship was, yet he had to safeguard his secret at any cost. He dare not tell her he how old he really was and that he was the person she believed was her father. He wasn't, of course, but it did feel good to pretend at a little happiness. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ New York 1961 Several months later: Nick and Stevie sat on the same couch with Stevie holding his hand to her abdomen. "Did you feel the baby kick?" Even though it was the dark of night outside, there was sunshine and warmth within. He looked into those laughing eyes that he so adored with the biggest goofiest grin on his face. "Yes." It was always a thrill to him to feel the quickening of new life. "That's some kick he's got there. I'll bet he'll be a fighter." "She, Nick. It's going to be a girl. I just know it." She rubbed her hand over her swollen belly, "Whatever it is, the baby's name will be Jamie Nichole or Nicholas Marshall after my father and after you. He felt an overwhelming honor and responsibility to this new life that lay under his hand. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Toronto 1996 He smiled at the memory. As they walked to Nick's car, he ventured to ask. "What's your middle name?" Jamie was a little surprised and taken aback by the question and she hesitated. "Just humor me." She smiled and nodded. "It's Nichole, Jamie Nichole Marshall...but then you weren't surprised, were you?" "I had an idea. Something I was told, once." She stopped and turned to Nick. "You're so lucky. You knew my father. All my life I've wondered what he was like. If he liked the same things I like or hated the same things I hate. I've always wondered what part of me came from him. You know what I mean?" Nick smiled a melancholy smile heavy with a promise that had passed from him , leaving only emptiness. "Come on. let's go. We've got to get you some clothes and food if your going to stay with me. I'm a bachelor and my cupboards are bare." They both laughed. ********************* Upon their arrival at her apartment, Jamie became somber again. The events of earlier that night took on a more real aspect in her mind. They stood amidst the shambles of all her worldly possessions. The turmoil and grief inside her mirroring the condition of her home. She turned to Nick for support, the pain evident on her face. "My God. Julie's really not coming back, is she?" "I'm afraid not." The jagged wound of loss rose to the surface and the tears came. She went to him and put her head on his shoulder and he embraced her. They stood there, holding each other. She mourned the loss of a good friend and companion. Nick mourned for the sight of Jamie's newborn face, the sight of her first step, to be there and kiss it better when she scraped her knee and all the other things a father does for his daughter. Those things were long gone. Someone else had been there, not him. Someone else had molded that small innocent child into the woman that now stood in his arms. The child that he had watched anxiously as it grew inside Stevie Marshall, so it also had grown under his heart where he carried her still. A single blood tear coursed it's way down Nicholas' cheek as he wept for all he had lost because of what he was. "You're bleeding." She reached up and touched the tear that lay on his cheek. Pulling her finger away, she looked at the red that stained her skin . His hand flew up to his face and he quickly remove the blood. "It's nothing . It just happens sometimes. I think it has something to do with my skin condition.." "Yes, I seem to remember something my mother said about my father having an allergy to the sun or some such. You must have inherited it from him." "I guess so. Now we better get going or we won't have enough time to get some groceries before the sun comes up." He pushed her into her bedroom, where her clothes lay, strewn about on the floor. ******************** Nick sat at the table while Jamie busied herself cooking a meal for the two of them. "I just love to cook. I guess I get it from my mother. She was a very good cook." "I seem to remember how she loved to cook." "What?" "It was something my father said. I seem to remember him saying how she loved to cook." "Well, I'm fixing one of her favorites, good Irish potato soup." "Hmm, smells good." he lied. "Do you have any garlic, Nick?" She asked as she was looking through the cupboards. He scowled, "No, I don't..." "Oh, never mind. I found some." He rolled his eyes, knowing exactly who was to blame for it. Quickly the air was filled with the smell of garlic. He wrinkled his nose at the irritation the odor brought. Jamie finished what she was doing and sat at the table opposite him. "So, tell me about my father. All I know is he was about my age when he was with my mother. That would make him...around seventy. That is if he's still alive. Is he, I mean you never did say." "He died a few years back of a heart attack." He knew it was wrong to lie to her. Nick wasn't old and gray as she believed her father to be. Maybe it was for the best she did not know the truth. He wanted to tell her, but was held constrained by the code to keep vampires a secret from the human population. He would have to be content to have her believe he was her brother. She sat there silent for a time pondering. "You know, I still had the hope I would get to meet him someday. Maybe I could have gotten to know the man, to understand more about myself through his eyes." He wanted to give that to her, but could not - would not. After all, he wasn't even her real father, so why did it matter anyway? "You have me. I can tell you anything you want to know. In exchange, you must tell me about yourself and your mother." She smiled and took his hand. "Your hands are so cold." He pulled away from her. "They say cold hands, warm heart." He laughed, nervously as he placed them on his lap. She then stood from the table and walked over to his side and put her hands on his shoulders. "I've always wanted a brother or sister. After my father left us, my mother was never interested in another man. I tried encouraging her to find someone else. She would just smile and say 'my Nicholas was enough for me'." He made a sudden intake of air and held it. She sat in the chair next to him with a hand still about his shoulder. Her body was so close he could smell her scent. It was the scent of one, he now knew to be long dead. He closed his eyes, trying to block the flood of sensations and emotions. They would not be banished so easily "You know, they were only together for a few months, but he gave her enough love to last her whole life. She died happy in that." Her nearness gave her words the force to strike him to the core. His reaction was so intense, he had to turn away. "She believed in that old saying 'it's better to have loved and lost, then never to have loved at all'." That sounded so much like her. He stood up and took a few steps away from the table. He closing his eyes and thrust his hands deep into his pockets. Nick tried to speak, but choked on the words. "Some day, I want a love like that." He looked back at her and forced a smile. A bitter inescapable longing filled him. He ached for that which he had lost ....forever. end part 4 Robbi Knightie With Dark Tendencies You must give in, you must give in. A game that you can't win, the hunger (FK CD "the Hunger") egersdor@magiclink.com I'm trying a new way to reformat may stories. I guess we'll see what happens. A Little Taste of Happiness Part 5 by Robbi Egersdorf >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Nick had insisted. "I sleep on the couch more often than not, anyway. Go ahead and take my bed." "I don't want to put you out any." "Listen, I invited you here. True, it was an invitation you couldn't turn down, but I invited you here all the same. I'll clear some room in the closet and drawers for your things. I won't hear an other word about it. It's settled." He could still hear her agree reluctantly as he stood at the foot of the bed and watched her sleep, a peaceful angel at rest. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz "Nicholas, it's time." Stevie's soft voice whispered in his ear. In a panic, he grabbed her very pregnant body up in his arms and took off running to the hospital. The wind blew against him and the rain came down in sheets, slowing his progress. With his destination in sight, he started to cross the street to the hospital when he realized it wasn't a road at all, but a river whose water's rushed by. He hesitated momentarily, then pressed on . Wading through the dark swirling waters of this barrier. The river grabbed and pulled at him, threatening to pull him down into it's murky deptha. Finally, he made it through the ER doors. They whisked her away and he was left alone in an empty waiting room. It seemed an eternity in that barren room with no news. At length, a nurse came in with a screaming bundle. "Mr. Knight?" "Yes." He took several steps towards the nurse, whose face took on a look of alarm. He took the baby from her arms and pulled the black blanket from the face and was greeted with the decidedly youn ger, but unmistakable face of Lacroix brandishing fangs and golden eyes as it laughed at him. The baby slipped from his grasp as big black wings unfolded from around the infant's body. The laughter sounded in time with the beating of the wings as he was left alone, once more. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz He jerked awake with blood sweat glistening on his forehead. It was still early, but he needed a drink of blood *now*. He knew there would be no more sleep that day. Walking over to the fridge in his black silk pajamas and bare feet, he reached in and pulled out a bottle which he was staring at. "I thought you were going to sleep all day." Startled, he nearly dropped the bottle. Nick had forgotten he wasn't alone. The memory of the previous night rushed back to him, complete with all the pain and regret from 35 years ago. Once he re gaining his composure, he ventured to inquire, "Did you sleep well?" "Quite well, thank you. That bed of yours is quite comfortable." Just then Natalie walked in from the lift. "Ah...am I interrupting something? Because if I am I can come back later." and she started to back back into the elevator. "No, wait Nat. I need to talk to you." "I needed to talk to you to." The chill in her voice washed over him. "I think I'll go take a shower and let you two work things out." Jamie darted up the stairs and disappeared into the bathroom. Natalie stood there with her arms folded and fire in her eyes. "Well?" "It's not what you think Nat, obviously." "It's not obvious to me. Why don't you enlighten me?" She folded her arms in front of her, daring him to explain it all away. "She's my daughter. Well, maybe not my daughter. How do I say this...I was very close to her mother when she was pregnant with Jamie. I...it felt like she was mine. I thought I would finally get a chance to have a family. Her mother actually told her I was her father. Honest Nat, the only feeling I have for this woman is paternal." Natalie's expression softened. She walked over to him and took his chin in her hand and squeezed slightly. "We *are* going to make you human one of these days." Nick let out a sigh of relief and enfolded her in his arms momentarily then let her go. "She's here under protective custody." "I know. Captain Reese told me. I just had to come see what was up. She could have gone a lot of other places, Tracy's for instance." "Not Jamie. If it were anyone else, but not Jamie. If she needs to be protected *I* will be the one to do it." They had moved over to the table and were sitting opposite each other. "So, what did you tell her?" I mean, there's no way she would think that *you* were her father." "She thinks I'm her half brother and I didn't discourage her. She recognized me from pictures that her mother had or I wouldn't have even known. There is a resemblance, but I would have never caugh t it if she hadn't said anything." "So, what are you going to do about it?" "Take it one day at a time. I don't know how long I'll have her around, just like I didn't know how long I would be with her mother 35 years ago. I didn't even get to stay until she was born. I ha d to leave." Natalie reached across the table and put her hands over his. "She means a lot to you, doesn't she? "She's the only daughter...the only child I ever had, so to speak and maybe the only one I'll ever have. I took the risk of loving her and losing her all those years ago, I'll do no less now." Natalie let the silence stretch for a few minutes then she got up from the table. "Jamie's not the only reason I came. I've got an idea to help you write your speech." "Great. Let's get to work." They sat and brainstormed until Jamie came down the stairs after her shower. "I hope you're done talking about me. My ears were sure burning." Her sunny smile brightened up the whole room. Nick met her at the foot of the stairs and led her over to Natalie who had stood from the table. "I think proper introductions are in order. Jamie, this is Dr. Natalie Lambert, forensic pathologist, close friend and my personal physician. Natalie, this is Jamie Marshall my..." He hesitated an d looked to Natalie. "This is my half sister. We had the same father." Natalie extended her hand and gave Jamie a hearty handshake. "It's nice to meet you, Jamie. Nick has always told me he had no family. I'm glad to see that isn't true. Now that you mention it, the re is kind of a family resemblance." Nick scowled at her and she simply shrugged it off. "I hadn't noticed." Jamie looked to Nick and began to study his face in an effort to find any similarities. "It's something you don't notice yourself." He put his arm around Jamie's shoulder and squeezed. "Now it's getting late and I need to use the shower. I have to work tonight." He picked the bottle back up from the table where he had set it earlier and headed for the stairs. "Don't worry about Jamie. I'll keep her company. I can fill her in on you." A momentary look of worry crossed his face then was gone. He walked partway up the stairs and looked back once more, to the two ladies in his life. They were totally engrossed in friendly conversat ion and the apprehension evaporated. He smiled to himself and bounded up to the second floor to get ready for the night. end part 5 Robbi Knightie With Dark Tendencies You must give in, you must give in. A game that you can't win, the hunger (FK CD "the Hunger") egersdor@magiclink.com A Little Taste of Happiness Part 6 by Robbi Egersdorf >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> He entered the precinct and then made his way over to look over Tracy's shoulder as she was going through a file on her PC. "You got anything on that Barnes case yet?" "Yeah, look. Julie's boyfriend, Donald Ellinger has an arrest report as long as your arm. Petty theft, grand theft auto, burglary, drug possession. He was even charged with murder once, but the ch arges were dropped due to lack of evidence. Suddenly, he remembered the letter Jamie had given him when he had questioned her the previous night. Tracy turned to Nick. "How's Julie Barnes' roommate doing?" "She's coping. I've got someone watching her at my place while I'm not there. Look, I've got to go. I just remembered something I left at home. Be back later." and he was off like a shot. Tracy scowled as she could only imagine what had been so important. ******************** "Knight here." "Nick, this is Tracy. You better get back here quick. They just found the boyfriend's body lying in the park, shot to death." He turned the Caddy around and headed to the park Tracy had directed him to. They arrived at the scene simultaneously. The flashing red and blue lights were a beacon for blocks. Nick and Tracy made their way to where Natalie was bending over a still form on the grass. She looked up from her clipboard to greet the Detectives. "Single shot to the chest at close range with a small caliber weapon. Estimated TOD two hours at the most. That would make it around 11:30 pm give or take half an hour. Nick took a second look at the body and it appeared someone had gone through the dead man's pockets. There was change, a matchbook, etc. scattered about near the body and all the pockets in the cada ver's clothes were turned inside out. If it were someone who rolled him after death there would not be any change. "Looks like whoever tore up Julie Barnes' apartment didn't have any luck finding what they were after." Tracy stated as she made notes on her note pad. Nick reached down and picked up the matchbook and opened it. Inside the cover was a hand written phone number. "Let's find out who this belongs to." He pulled out his cellular phone and dialed. " Hi, Vera. This is Nick. I need you to get the name and address of the owner of this phone number - 555-3728." There was a pause while he waited for the answer. "Thanks Vera. You're a peach." He put the phone back in his coat. "This number belongs to Eric Corbino." "Eric Corbino? Isn't he the one who owns Corbino Toys out of Toronto?" "Yeah. Let's go have a talk with him and see if he knows why a dead man has his phone number." ******************** They drove up to a large, pretentious house in the more affluent neighborhoods of Toronto. A woman in her mid forties answered the door and showed them in. "Mr. Corbino is expecting you. This way. " They followed her into a spacious room that appeared to be an office, where Eric was waiting. Nick was surprised at the apparent youth of the man. Tracy whispered, "He made his first million before the age of twenty." "Thanks for that little bit of trivia, Tracy." he whispered back. Mr. Corbino was of medium build, tanned with dark brown hair and brown eyes. He was dressed in an Italian tailored, smoke colored suit. His bearing spoke of self-confidence and success, a man accust omed to wielding power over others. "Come, officers, have a seat. Would you like any refreshments?" "No thank you. We're here to ask questions about a man who was found dead tonight. His name was Donald Ellinger. He had this in his pocket." Nick handed him the matchbook. "That's my number all right." He handed it back to Nick. "What do you want to know?" "Why would he have you phone number?" "Because he was blackmailing me. During a moment of indiscretion, he saw an opportunity for a free ride. He said he had pictures. At first I went along with him and paid what he wanted, but he sta rted pushing for more and more money. The last time he called, I told him I wasn't going to pay him anymore and he threatened to go to my wife. I made a decision to tell her the truth myself and ta ke the consequences." "Where were you earlier tonight?" "I was here, alone. My wife is out of town and Angie, the woman who let you in, was out running errands. I was on the phone to a buyer in New York from 10:30 till about 11. This is the number." H e wrote the number out on a pad on his desk and handed it to Tracy. "Go ahead and check it out." "We will." Returned Tracy. "Now, if you'll excuse me I have some paperwork to catch up on. If there's anything else, you know where to find me. You've got my number after all." ******************** "Do you think he did it? I mean he's got a motive and a telephone call isn't the most reliable alibi." "I don't know, Tracy. Sounds like he had taken the teeth out of his blackmailer. He would have no more reason to kill Ellinger if he was going to come clean with his wife." "What if that's just what he wants us to think?" "He sounded pretty sincere to me." "He could lose a lot in a divorce settlement." "That's true, but I just don't think he's guilty." They were nearing the precinct and Nick took the turn to park. The comment Tracy made earlier at the scene of Ellinger's murder echoed in his head. *Looks like whoever tore up Julie Barnes' apartment didn't have any luck in finding what they were after.*. Nick navigated the Caddy into a parking space and threw it into park leaving the engine running. He pulled out his cellular and dialed his number. It rang until the answering machine picked up. "T racy, there's no answer at my place, go get some back-up and meet me there. I've got to see if Jamie's okay?" She got out of the car and he sped off, tires squealing. Nick drove a couple blocks then turned into a deserted alley. He left the car and took to the air. The chill of the night brought back the memory of a certain day some 35 years ago. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ New York 1961 A few months later, Nick was waiting for Stevie at their usual meeting spot. She hadn't shown up and it was getting late. He had an uncomfortable feeling creep over him. The bulk of her abdomen wa s threatening to overtake her body and Nick had a hard time believing that she could still walk to work with her waddle. He tried to get her to slow down, maybe take a cab or work less, but she insi sted the exercise was good for her and the baby. Nick hovered over her every waking minute. Stevie had been late before because of emergencies or short staffing, but this just felt wrong. He decided to check at the hospital. There he found her huddled in a corner of the nurse's lounge, cr ying inconsolably. "They couldn't do anything. *I* couldn't do anything." and the sobs came louder. Nick gently cradled her and stroked her hair, making a gentle shhh sound in her ear. "I'm here now. It's okay, it's okay." He had carried her home with little effort and tucked here into her bed. "They just let her die. The accident was so bad. She was torn and bleeding. The baby she carried was dead before they reached us. There was blood everywhere. I couldn't stop it. Her life just s eeped away." He started to stand. "Nick!" She grabbed him by the collar with both hands. "Don't leave me. I don't want to be alone." He thought for a minute then slipped off his shoes and slid under the covers beside her, cradling her like a lost child. He began to rock and hum to her some of the beautiful melodies he had learned over the centuries in hopes that it would calm her troubled mind. The sobbing slowly subsided and her face relaxed as she drifted away on the wings of sleep. By that time, Nick had also been claimed by sleep. end part 6 Robbi Knightie With Dark Tendencies You must give in, you must give in. A game that you can't win, the hunger (FK CD "the Hunger") egersdor@magiclink.com A Little Taste of Happiness Part by Robbi Egersdorf >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> He reached the loft and could not sense any life. He entered to find signs of a struggle. The scent of fresh human blood was strong in the air and he followed it over behind the couch where the bod y of the officer lay, his throat cut. The vampire in him strained at the self imposed restraints for an instant then was subdued again. "Jamie? Jamie?" He called as he frantically searched the loft for any sign of her and found none. Grateful for that, at least she hadn't been left dead. He opened a window and took to the sky onc e again. His hope was to catch up with them, that they hadn't left the area, yet. He could find nothing, so he returned as Tracy arrived with the back-up he had requested. Nick motioned to the body. "Better call it in. I was too late." "And Jamie?" "There's no sign of her." His mind went once again to the letter in his jacket pocket. He rushed over and pulled it out and held it up. Thank goodness the letter hadn't been found. He tore the envelope open and pulled out the contents. As he unfolding the letter, something fell to the floor. He reached down to pick up some very incriminating photos complete with negatives. Two people were dead and a third missing b ecause of them. "Tracy," He walked over to her as she was just getting off the phone. "These were mailed to Julie Barnes by Donald Ellinger. I think this is what our murderer is after. See if you can get a warra nt out for Eric Corbino's arrest. He may even have Jamie." Tracy looked up from the pictures to find Nick had gone. She hadn't even noticed the whooshing of the movement of air as he left. She shook her head. "He sure can move fast when he wants to." ******************** Nick was out to find Eric and get any information from him by questioning or stronger persuasion, whatever it took. He *had* to get to Jamie while she was still alive. He should have been there for her. He had made a grave mistake in trusting her life to someone else and now that someone lay dead at the loft. She was his responsibility and he had blown it. Nick had known that she was at ris k. If anything happened to Jamie, he would never be able to forgive himself. Just then his cellular chirped. He found a handy, deserted rooftop and set down, then answered the phone. "Knight here." "Nick, it's Tracy. You better get back here. You had a phone call from the party that has Jamie Marshall. They wouldn't talk to anyone but you. Nick? Nick? Are you there?" She turned off the phone and set it down on the receiver. "He just hung up like that." There was a soft whoosh and a gentle breeze. Tracy turned from the phone and nearly ran smack into Nick. "Have they called back yet?" There was a sense of urgency in his voice. Tracy gave a short, high squeal. "Don't do that! Your going to give me a heart attack. How did you get back so fast?" "I was just downstairs. Have they called again?" The phone rang in answer to his question. He turned and stared at it as it rang a second time. Slowly, he reached for it. "This is Nick Knight." "We've got the girl." "Jamie? Is she all right?" "She's fine and if you want her to stay that way, you'll listen." The voice was distorted electronically to negate any chance of recognition "I want the envelope and everything in it. I know you h ave it. She told me she gave it to you." "Yes, I have it." "Good. We're going to work out a trade. the girl for the envelope. Follow the instructions or she goes flying, only she doesn't have wings. Got me?" "Yeah, I got you." "Good, now listen carefully. Meet me at the top of her apartment building in half an hour. I know you know where it is. Come alone or all bets are off. From there I will be able to tell if you're playing by the rules. If you don't behave, then splat, no more Jamie." The caller laughed, then hung up the phone. He looked to Tracy, who was just getting off her cellular. She shook her head. "The phone call was made from a payphone. They would be long gone before we could get there." "Damn!" The force of all the frustration and anger came out in that single word." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ New York 1961 He awoke with a start, the woman warm and so near to his side. The hunger burned strongly in him. The vampire rose with startling swiftness as his eyes turned to gold and his canines descended. Al l that he *was* at that very minute was the hunger needing to be fed. All he knew was the closeness of the woman and the call of her life's blood as it whispered to him with each beat of her heart. He moved in for the kill before he caught a glimpse of her face. The recognition sobered him and he abruptly dropped Stevie, running from the room. The sun was just receding, the last faint rays were yet visible. He leaned on the wall in the kitchen for support. "Nick? Are you all right?" She walked up behind him, putting her hand to his cheek, forcing him to face her. All trace of the predator was now gone from his eyes. The sadness was palpable in his countenance. The realization hit him full force. *He_could_not_have_this_chance_at_happiness*. *He_could_ not _continue_this_masquerade*. Stevie and her unborn child would pay the consequences. He had no right to ask that of them. He had no place in their world, but how could he leave all of this behind? How could he not? This was something he had desired all his life. He would walk away from it and not look back. He looked deeply into her eyes and all he could see reflected there was a total love and acceptance of him. There was absolutely no fear in her. She was so innocent. She did not have even the smal lest notion how closely death had stalked her that day nor that her close friend and confidant was the bearer of that death. He enfolded her in his arms, holding her maybe a little too tightly in the desperation of the moment. Just as suddenly he released her with a calm decisiveness. Tenderly, he kissed her forehead. " Everything is just fine. I think I had a nightmare or something." "Would you like me to make us something the eat?" "I've got to get going. I haven't even been home since last night." He gestured to his slept-in uniform. "Ah, I see. Later then?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ He had deserted Stevie and Jamie when they had needed him the most. That fact made it even more important for Nick to be there for Jamie *now*. end part 7 Robbi Knightie With Dark Tendencies You must give in, you must give in. A game that you can't win, the hunger (FK CD "the Hunger") egersdor@magiclink.com A Little Taste of Happiness Part 8 by Robbi Egersdorf >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Eric had worked too hard to get where he was. No blackmailer nor his witch of a wife were going to bring him down. Things were not going to be settled so easily. It would have been a simple matter if Donald hadn't gotten so greedy. He had been given everything he had asked for and still he refused to give up the pictures. They continued to hang over Eric's head like an axe. That axe would never fall. "Why didn't you stick to the agreement? Why?" The kidnapper screamed and pounded a fist on the steering wheel of the car. The murderer then turned to Jamie, who was bound tightly with duct tape around her ankles and wrists as well as gagged with the tape over her mouth, her eyes wide with terror. Her abductor wore a mask and was heavily dressed in several layers of clothing that ended in a long dark coat. The voice continued to be electronically distorted. Jamie did not know who this person was, she only knew that she was in grave danger. It was certain to Jamie that this person had killed Julie and would probably be her killer as well. She closed her eyes and prayed for salvation an d a rescue. A rescue that seemed an impossibility. Here she was, totally at the mercy of the whims of this insane person. He could cut her throat just as she had seen done to her guard. The scene replayed in her head to Jamie's horror and no amount of effort could stop it. The slash of the knife. The blood spurting everywhere. She squeezed her eyes shut in a vain effort to stop the tears. It was like trying to hold back water after the dam had broke. Whimpering came to her ears. It seemed to originate from a distance, then she knew it was her own. The fear was so intense that her mind was overloading. She wasn't ready nor was she willing to die. There was so much in her life left undone. Jamie wanted a chance to become a nurse like her mother. The idea of nursing people who needed her had always been appealing to her. She had been afraid she just couldn't do it. Jamie had doubted herself. What if she wasn't smart enough? What if watching someone die was too hard for her. Could she really bring herself to stick a needle into someone or a tube into someone's nose? *Now* there would be no choice. There would be no chance to find out if she had what it took. What would be left to prove she had been here? All her life she had lived selfishly. Now, when she was gone, there would be no one to mourn her passing...except Nick. Dear, sweet Nick. The brother she never knew she had. Why couldn't they have grown up together? Why wasn't she allowed the chance to get to know this man? He was practically a stranger, yet she felt drawn to him in ways she did not understand. She would never get to know who he really was. Oh the irony of it all. She finally got the brother she had longed for all of her life - at the end of her life. How she wished she had taken the opportunity to tell him how she felt. Now it would be just one of those things that was never said. The car stopped and the figure got out. Roughly, Jamie was pulled from the vehicle and the tape from her ankles was removed. She was turned until the masked face was bare inches from her own. "Don't try to run or you'll get this." The gun was brought up in front or her eyes. "Got it!" Shakily she was pulled forward by her arm, almost stumbling. They were at her apartment building. Jamie began to realize that she was meant to meet Julie's fate. The fear exploded in her stomach. She stopped walking and struggled against the grip of her captor. The gun was once again brought up close to her face. Abruptly she stopped her struggling. "Don't try that again. You won't get far." Jamie knew she would have to get control of herself, or her life would end right there and now. Shortly they were on the roof as she had known they would be. She was brought close to the edge. Every nerve in her body began to scream. She could not stop the shaking. Closing her eyes, she uttered a prayer once more for salvation and for the courage to face what lay ahead with dignity. A soft rain began to fall. When she opened her eyes again she was still a captive, still bound and gagged, and her abductor was still menacing before her, but somehow she had reached a place in her heart that afforded her some small grain of courage. Jamie knew she would now be able to face whatever happened to her. Silently she willed "Nicholas, hear me. I...love...you. Please *know* that I love you." She closed her eyes and the tears poured anew. "I love you." ******************** "I've got to do this alone, Tracy. There's no other way." "No. I can't let you do this. It goes against all my training." "I don't have a choice. She's my responsibility. I'm the one who put her life in danger. I'm not going to let her down again." Tracy's voice was growing angry with frustration. "Yeah and I'm going to be left to pick up the body's afterward." "Okay." He would have to make some kind of concession to Tracy or he would never get out of the loft. "Call in back up, but make it slow. Let me see if I can work things out first. He told me to meet him in an hour at the apartment building Julie Barnes was killed at. That gives us 40 minutes." He hated having to lie, but there was no choice. Nick had to give Jamie every chance he possibly could and that meant going alone as the caller had demanded. It also meant he would not be observed if he needed to use his vampiric abilities. "So what do we do until then, just wait here until it's time?" "I think that would be a wonderful idea. Now give me those pictures." She handed him the pictures and he returned them to their envelope. "Ah, Tracy. I need to go change my clothes. I'll be right back." He bound up the stairs to the bedroom where he opened a window and took to the sky. As he reached up over the roof tops of the city, a gentle rain began falling. end part 8 Robbi Knightie With Dark Tendencies You must give in, you must give in. A game that you can't win, the hunger (FK CD "the Hunger") egersdor@magiclink.com Date: Friday, 03-May-96 09:58 AM A Little Taste of Happiness Part 9 by Robbi Egersdorf >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> As he neared the apartment, he could see the two figures on the roof near the edge. There was a gun pointed at Jamie's head and the dark figure had what appeared to be a death grip on her. This mad e it impossible to safely grab the killer from behind. Nick would have to face Eric Corbino on his own terms. He landed, entered the building and was up on the roof in an instant. The dark figure was startled to see Nick and pointed the gun at him. "How did you get here? I didn't see you drive up." Nick put up his hands in a gesture of surrender. "I came around the back." "You better be alone." "I'm alone, just as I promised." He was slowly inching his way toward the pair. "Don't come any closer." The gun was turned back to Jamie. Nick stopped. "Okay, okay. Take it easy. I've got the pictures right here in my pocket." "First, I want you to put your gun down and kick it over to me." There was a slight hesitation on Nick's part. "Come on! Don't play games." The assailants voice was showing the strain. Slowly he reached under his coat and pulled the gun out of it's holster, took out the clip and did as he had been instructed. "Okay, now I'm unarmed." "I want those pictures." "I'm reaching in to get them, slowly." He pulled the envelope from the breast pocket of his coat. "You're not going to get away with this, Eric." "No!" The gun was once again on Nick. In an instant he was on the assailant and they struggled with the gun. A single shot rang out and Jamie slumped to the ground. Nick made a strangled cry and dove fo r her. He was totally oblivious to the black figure who grabbed the envelope and ran. "My little girl! What have I done?" He tore the tape off her mouth and hands "Nick, Nick. I prayed you would come." A moan escaped from her and a look of pain crossed her face. "I don't want to die." Then she slumped over. Nick held her close, his sensitive hearing could just detect a faint heartbeat. Time was growing short, he must hurry and get her to a hospital. "I won't let you die, not now, my beautiful daughte r." He cradled her gently as he flew through the sky. The rain had picked up and was coming down in sheets as the wind blew against him, impeding his progress. On through the night they sped, while Nick listened to the slow steady beat. ******************** Tracy sat on the arm of the couch and glanced at her watch again. "Come on, Nick. What's taking you so long. "I just had to get Prima Donna for a partner." Her impatience was apparent in her voic e. Standing, she walked up the stairs and pounded on the door to Nick's bedroom. It swung open. "Nick? Are you in there?" She entered and switched on the light. The room was deserted and there was a breeze blowing through the room calling her attention to the window that sat open. "He's done it to me again." She stormed out of the room and back downstairs. Reaching for the phone, she ordered back up and sent them to the apartment building. There was a moment of hesitation in calling Nick on his cellular phone for fear of interrupting anything. It p assed quickly when she thought about what he had done to her. Feeling the irritation, she dialed his number. ******************** The dream came back to him as he fought the wind and rain. He hoped it wouldn't slow him down too much. Flying for what seemed an eternity, he came into sight of the hospital. Nick touched down fa r enough from the Emergency Room doors not to draw attention to himself, then sprinted the rest of the way. Jamie's heart continued to sound in his ears with the same slow steady beat. Bursting through the into the ER, he shouted, "I need a Doctor, she's been shot." Instantly he was set upon by a barrag e of Doctors and Nurses who took his burden from him, and took her away on a guerney. Someone escorted him to a waiting area and he was told they would let him know how she was as soon as they knew anything. He was pacing the floor when his phone rang. "Knight." "You've got some explaining to do, skipping out on me like that..." "Tracy, Jamie's been shot." She stopped her tyrade to listen. "We're at Scarborough General Hospital...She's still hanging in there. The doctors are with her now." "What happened?" "We were struggling for the gun, when it went off, hitting Jamie in the chest." "What about the perp?" Nick hesitated, then spoke slowely. "He got away with the pictures." "Great, just great. How are we going to explain this to Captain Reese's satisfaction. He's not going to like this, he's not going to like this one bit." Then she hung up the phone. ******************** Natalie rushed in and over to Nick, giving him a hug of support. "I'm so sorry. How's she doing?" "She's in recovery right now. They think she's going to be all right. They'll let me see her as soon as she wakes up." Tracy came trailing in, walked over to her partner, and gave him a short hug, looking around uncomfortably. "I'm sorry about your sister." He got a puzzled look on his face then looked at Natalie. "I told her about it." "Oh." He turned back to Tracy. "Your sisters sure turn up in the strangest places. You must have *some* family." "Yeah, it's gets interesting at times." That, at least was the truth. "Well, I'm going to find me some coffee. Want some?" "No, thanks." "I'll take some." Natalie yawned. "My caffeine level's getting kind of low." Tracy left the pair and they were alone. "You do realize it's 8 in the morning and the sun is shining bright?" "I just couldn't leave her. It's all my fault Nat, I never should have let her out of my sight. I never should have rushed him when I did. I could have waited for a better chance. Why does everyt hing I touch turn out bad? It's this blasted curse of mine." "Are we back to that Black Buddha thing again, because if we are..." "No. I mean this curse. The vampire curse." "If it wasn't for your *vampire curse* you both would probably be dead right now." Anger edged her voice. She had no patience when it came to his self-pity crap. Someone had to shake him and it al ways seemed as if the job fell to her to keep his feet grounded in reality. "And as for you putting her in danger, that happened before you came on the scene. She might have died long before this i f it hadn't been for you. It's because of *you* that she's here and still alive. This little delusion of your *curse* just doesn't wash with me. Things just happen sometimes." "Okay, okay. I surrender." He force a smile. Tracy returned with two cups of coffee and handed one to Natalie, who gratefully began to sip on it. "You're not going to like this, Nick. They brought Eric Sorbino in for questioning and he has an alibi this time. He was with his lady in the pictures all night and she confirmed his story." Nick cursed under his breath. "Well, got to go." She smiled and squeezed Nick's hand. "Hang in there. It'll all work out." end part 9 Robbi Knightie With Dark Tendencies You must give in, you must give in. A game that you can't win, the hunger (FK CD "the Hunger") egersdor@magiclink.com A Little Taste of Happiness Part 10 by Robbi Egersdorf >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Natalie waited with him and when they called him into her room, she followed. Nick walked over and sat on the edge of her bed, taking her warm hand in his. "How's my little Jamie doing?" His voice was soft and gentle. Reaching up, he stroked back her hair. She smiled weakly. "I'm still here, thanks to you." He returned her smile. "I seem to remember..." "Shh. We can talk about it later. You need to get your rest." He bent over and kissed her on the forehead. "I'll be right here if you need me." She slowly closed her eyes and relaxed. Taking the chair next to her bed, he continued to hold her hand. He wanted her to know he was there. Natalie came over and put her hands on his shoulders. "I think I'll go talk to the Doctors and see what's going on with her." She left the room with a last glance back at him. He appeared so vulne rable at that very moment. ******************** Natalie returned with the little black bag she always carried in her car. Nick looked up as she set about drawing a sample of Jamie's blood. "What are you doing?" "Taking a blood sample." She replied deliberately avoiding what she knew was the real question. "I know that. Why do you need a sample of her blood?" She finished and packed the sample into the bag. She turned to Nick, trying to decide what to say, hesitating. "I didn't want to tell you this, but..." The silence grew. "Jamie's blood is doing s trange things. I have a hunch I want to check out. I've got to go now." He was up and out of his chair, and had a hold of her arm to restrict her leaving before she explained. "What do you mean. I need to know." "Nick, I want to check it out first before I say anything." "You think she might be my flesh and blood daughter don't you?" She remained silent, looking down at the bag in her hand. Quietly he repeated. "Don't you?" "I just want to check it out is all." "No! There is no possibility of that. If I would have taken Jamie's mother, she would have been dead before conception would even occur much less...What you are implying is an impossibility. You k now that better than anyone." "Do I? Do I know that you didn't go to sleep that night that you spent with Jamie's mother and in a dream, believe with all your being that you were a mortal man. That 'mortal' Nick then made love to Stephanie Marshall who became pregnant from that encounter. Do you remember Ellen Simmons. Two of her personalities were human, able to eat and go out into the sunlight. Then there was Jacquel ine, who was all vampire. The three of them inhabited the same body. I don't know. What if you experienced a temporary split in your personality for some unknown reason. Tell me Nick. Do you rem ember what happened that night? Can you tell me with surety that it didn't happen that way?" He concentrated, bringing up the memory. "We sat and talked most the day, then I went to get some rest. I remember I was very tired and very hungry. If anything had happened, Stevie would have die d that day." "Concentrate on the memory." She said sharply. "Not on what you believe to be true. Only the memory of what actually happened." Taking Natalie's rebuke, he sent his mind back to that night once again. He was walking home from work and out of nowhere, milk was spilling everywhere. She pulled him into her apartment, took his clothes, then they talked...they talked... "We sat on her couch and talked for a long time. I can't remember what we talked about." His words were slow and deliberate. "I don't remember, Nat. I don't remember what happened. How can that be? It's a blank." His face reflected the bewilderment he felt. "Like I said, I want to check it out. Let's wait to make any judgements. Right now, I'm going to go see Whittaker down at the Institute again. I'll need to examine her blood under his tunneling el ectron microscope so I can compare it to yours." "Okay." He released her arm. She smiled at him then turned and left the room. She stopped outside the door and leaned heavily on the wall. There was a yawning emptiness growing inside of her. Shaking her head, she dismissed the thought completely and left the hospital. He went back and took his seat beside her bed. It didn't matter to him whether or not she was his daughter in flesh, she was his daughter in spirit. That was what mattered, wasn't it? He didn't ev en know if it was possible for him to impregnate a mortal woman, if she were to survive the mating. ********************* Nick felt confident that the killer would no longer come after Jamie. After all, he now possessed the thing that he had been after. The pictures were gone and any lead to the killer as well. Eric Corbino had an alibi. There was still a chance that he was lying. He needed to talk with him one more time. That's where he would go next. Jamie had rested comfortably through the day, with no problems. They had a few short visits, but for the most part she had slept and healed. That night he left her with a guard on the door. ******************** The minute he walked into the station, Reese grabbed him and took him to his office. "Nick, you know you're in hot water with this one. What were you thinking, taking chances like that with your li fe and with Miss Marshall's life and you lost an important piece of evidence. I want your report on my desk by the end of your shift" Nick stood and walked to the door, pausing with his hand on the knob. "Tell me Captain, what would you have done if she were your sister?" "I didn't know." He paused to weigh his words. "I probably would have done the same thing. *That's* between you and me. Officially, I disapprove. Understand?" Nick nodded in agreement. "Oh, and Nick. You're off this case." He knew it would do him no good to argue. When Joe Reese got like this, he didn't change his mind for anybody. This Captain had always had a hard time accepting Nick's 'Lone Ranger' attitude. Nick just nodded his head again and was out the door. He wasn't going to let this one drop, he just wouldn't tell the Cap. There had too much wrapped up in this one, already. Grabbing Tracy, they headed for Corbino's place. "Nick, I don't know what you think you're going to accomplish with this visit. Cap's going to bust an important blood vessel when he finds out. Besides, this guy's already been cleared by an alibi. " "Yes, his mistress and they could be lying. I still need some of my questions answered. Tracy, I just can't let this one go" "Okay. I'll just defer to the judgement of my senior partner. I want one thing understood, though. If there's any trouble, I want to go on record as this being none of my doing, agreed?" "Agreed. I'll take the blame. If we solve this case, I get all the credit, agreed?" "Now, I didn't say that." He smiled at her and she knew it was just his sense of humor showing through. She couldn't help but laugh. "We'll see." end part 10 Robbi Knightie With Dark Tendencies You must give in, you must give in. A game that you can't win, the hunger (FK CD "the Hunger") egersdor@magiclink.com A Little Taste of Happiness Part 11 by Robbi Egersdorf >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> They were let into the house by the same woman as before. Mr. Corbino was cooperative, but still no help. Nick just couldn't come up with the questions that he knew would elicit the answers he was looking for. Somehow his mind had taken off in a different vein of reasoning, leaving him floundering in the dust. Most of his questions seemed to pertain to the secretary who had answered the door the two times they visited the house. Tracy was quiet on the drive back to the station. Just as he started to park the Caddy, Nick's mobile phone rang and demanded his attention. "Knight here." "Nick, this is Natalie. I think you better get over here right away." "I'm on my way." He looked over at Tracy. "I'm going, I'm going. I just remembered, I have a lot of paperwork to do. Oh and Nick, don't get into any more trouble. You're walking on thin ice with this one already." "Don't you know by now, trouble is my middle name." and he smiled teasingly. She gave him a stern look. "Okay, okay. I'll behave myself. How's that?" "Better." and she slammed the Caddy door and walked off without a backward glance "Whew." He voiced, shaking his head. "I just don't know what she's so worried about. You'd think she was my mother or something." ******************** "Oh, Nick. You're here." She looked up from her microscope and beckoned to him. "I've got something to show you." She reached down and picked up two pieces of paper. "You know the sample of blood I took from Jamie? I found extra nucleotides on her strands of RNA." She held up the photograph and pointed to the formations. "They're similar to the extra nucleotides I found on your strands of RNA, only hers could possibly be a normal human genetic aberration. There's no way for me to be sure without samples from her mother to compare it to. You said she had died, didn't you?" "Yes. So, what does all of this mean to me? "There's no way I can ever be 100% sure, but there is a possibility that Jamie is your natural daughter." He stood there stunned and unmoving. "I never even dared believe, and now you're telling me it's true." "Nick, I said there's a possibility. I can't be sure." Nick headed for the door, leaving Natalie in the silence of the morgue. She watched him as he left with longing in her heart. His thought's spun, uncontrollably. That's why Jamie was told he was her real father. He now had confirmation that he had a daughter. It didn't matter that there was a chance she wasn't his. The only thing that mattered was the chance that she was. He had to see her, talk to her. Nick didn't even bother with his car. He took straight to the air and headed for the hospital. ******************** When he entered her room, she was sitting up in bed, watching TV. She saw him and smiled. Turning off the set, she motioned for him to sit on the edge of her bed. "You're the hero of the hour. You saved my life. Some guys from downtown, I can't remember who the y said they were; were here to ask me what happened. What's that all about?" "Just my Captain, making sure I did everything by the book. It's nothing. Don't worry about it." "Nick, I knew I was going to die out there. I saw myself fall from that roof, just like Julie." She had to stop and take a deep breath. "Shh," He put a finger up to her lips. "It's all right now. I'm not going to let anyone hurt you." She leaned over to him and put her arms around him. "While I was unconscious, the shooting kept replaying over and over in my head." She released him and put a hand up to her head in an effort to aid her memory. "You were ten feet away and then you were on top of him. The way you held his wrist, I heard the sound of bones crunching just before the gun went off. That's a sound I'll never for get." "That's it! That's what has been nagging at my mind. It wasn't Eric Corbino that had you." He reached for his phone and called Captain Reese. "Cap, I need a warrant to search Angie Schnobrich's place. She's Eric Corbino's private secretary. She lives in the servant's cottage behind Eric's main house." "Nick, I thought I told you..." "I know. Angie did it. She's the killer." "If you're sure about this?" "I'm sure." ******************** When Nick and Tracy arrived at her door there was no answer. They held their guns to the ready for trouble. Nick shouted, "Police. Open up." There was no response. Eric had said she was there. The pair stood to either side of the door. Nick tried the knob. It was unlocked. Pushing the door open, they waited. No response came so they entered the house. Nick could pick up the sound of a fire burning and a single heartbeat. The smell of smoke was in the air. He rushed to where the sounds were coming from and found Angie busily throwing the pictures and the clothes she had worn when kidnapping Jamie into the fireplace. When Nick entered, she turned with a gun pointed at him. "How did you know it was me?" "The cast on your left wrist gave you away. I broke your wrist when we struggled for the gun, didn't I?" "Yes, you did. I still got the pictures and now they're destroyed. I had to protect him, you know." At that minute, Eric walked in. He was worried for Angie's welfare. She had worked as his secretary now for the past four years and they had gotten quite close. She looked to him pleading his forgiveness with her eyes. "I had to protect you. Don't you see. Those people were trying to hurt you. They had to die. Oh, Eric. I'm so sorry. I was so young and so poor when you were born. I just couldn't give you everything you deserved, so I gave you to a family who could." The self-confident toy magnate stood, stunned and unsure. "Why didn't you tell me?" "Because you would hate me for what I am, for what I did. Oh, I've failed you. I never should have given you away." As she spoke, the memories of 1961 flooded Nick's mind. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ New York 1961 "I'll see you later?" Her expression went from hopeful to disappointment as Nick spoke. "That's something I need to talk to you about. There's no easy way to tell you this. I'm going out of the country. Important family matters. I really hate leaving you like this with the time getting so close. I don't know when I'll be back." "I see." The disappointment and pain were evident in her voice. Nick felt a wrenching in his gut. There was no turning back now. This was the right thing to do, wasn't it? "I leave tonight." "Then I won't see you again, will I?" "I'll be back to see you as soon as I can." "Come on, Nick. We both know you won't be back." She turned her back on him and walked into the other room. He looked after her, his heart breaking. "I care for you, Stephanie Marshall. That's why I have to go." He turned to the door and left, never to see her alive again. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Toronto 1996 "I see it in your eyes. My only child hates - is repulsed by me. That's why I never told you." Her face went blank and she turned the gun on herself, firing one shot to her right temple at point blank range. Her body dropped like a stone. Everyone stood by, stunned by what had just occurred. end part 11 Robbi Knightie With Dark Tendencies You must give in, you must give in. A game that you can't win, the hunger (FK CD "the Hunger") egersdor@magiclink.com A Little Taste of Happiness Part 12 by Robbi Egersdorf >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Nick leaned against the counter as Natalie finished with Angie Schnobrich's body. "It's so sad. She regretted giving up her son so much that she killed to protect him." Natalie pulled the sheet up over the body. "The hard part for me is, she was so afraid to tell him who she was and when she finally did, all she could see was what she had expected - rejection. I know how she feels. I'm afraid to tell Jamie about me." Natalie made a groan. "I know. I know, but doesn't she have the right to know?" "You're right, Nick. She has the right to know. Do you have what it takes to tell her who you are and what you are? To chance rejection?" "If I don't chance the rejection, I'll never know whether she would accept me; deep, dark secrets and all." "There are other things you need to consider." "Don't you think I've been over them a million times in my head?" Natalie walked over to Nick and put her hand on his arm. "Whatever you decide, I'll be here for you." He reached up and took a handful of hair, feeling it's texture. "You don't know how much that means to me." ******************** He stood by Jamie's bed, watching her sleep. She was so peaceful. Nick could almost see her as an infant, cradled in her mother's arms. He remembered when Stevie told him she was pregnant, he had a ssumed she had been for some time. She must have thought he knew. He hadn't been there when Jamie was born. He didn't know how long after their meeting she came. Why couldn't he remember what happened that night? If Natalie was right, then a 'human' Nick took Stevie that night and made love to her. He just didn't have access to those memories. As he stood there contemplating what he should do, his dream returned to him once again. Telling her is the river he would have to cross to his daughter. Jamie stirred, opened her eyes and looked at Nick, sensing that he was troubled. "How are you?" "I'm fine, now." She reached out and took his hand. "Where have you been? "We just found the person who kidnapped and tried to kill you. It wasn't the man we thought. It was his mother." Her face showed mild surprise. "Good. I feel a little safer now. You didn't let me finish what I was saying the last time you were here." "Sorry. Go ahead. I'm all your's. I promise, I won't get the sudden urge to go arrest bad guys this time." She laughed, then held a hand to her chest. "It hurts to laugh." He sat on the edge of her bed. "Please, tell me what you have to say." There was a new gentleness in his voice. "Maybe it was just my imagination, anyway." "I want to know what you have to say." She hesitated, staring deeply into his eyes. Maybe she could see something there that she hadn't before. She wasn't sure what she was looking for, but she knew it was there. "I swear I heard you call me your daughter. Why would you say that?" Nick reached up and pushed a stray hair back out of her face then, stood and went to the window. He stared out at the blackness that engulfed and defined his world. "The truth?" He turned to see her expression, but couldn't read it. "Yes, I want the truth." He walked over and stood at the foot of her bed. "You were right the first time we met. I... *am* the man in the pictures you saw." "But, how..." He held up one hand to silence her. "It doesn't matter how. Right now, just know that I am far older than what your eyes tell you. Believe me when I say *I* am the man who left your mother to raise you alone. The most important thing to me, was her safety. I knew my being there, put her in danger." He had been looking down at his hands as he ran them along the footboard. Now he looked up into her face. She opened her mouth to speak and no words came. She let out a sigh and turned her head away. "I don't know what to say." She took a deep breath. "I don't even know what to think. You want me to believe that you are my father." "I didn't say that. I don't know if I'm your father." "You want me to believe you're the man my mother told me was my father. This is just too much." She closed her eyes and lay her head back on the pillow, facing away from Nick again. "I think you should go now. I need to think things through." He turned to go, feeling the arrow of rejection through his chest. She put up her hand. "Wait. Don't think that this is the end. I just need some time." He nodded and smiled his sad, bittersweet smile at her and left. ******************** Driving the Caddy back to the Precinct, he had the radio tuned to CERK radio. The strains of Mozart's Magic Flute died out and were replaced by the smooth, controlled voice of Lucien Lacroix, the Nightcrawler. "We are tossed on the waves of life's little ups and downs. We put up with it in an attempt to paddle our way to what we believe to be an island of happiness in this storm tossed existence. I say that it is an illusion. A mirage created by a mind, that is searching for what it believes to be happiness. Search all you want. Paddle against the current if you must. Your goal will always be just out of your reach. I dare you to find a little taste of happiness, then watch it wither and turn to dust. The dust of a flower long dead." Nick clicked off the radio. Maybe all of this was just an illusion that would soon pass from existence, but it was his illusion. His here and now. It did matter. It had to matter or he was living his life in vain. After his shift was over, he went home to the loft. It had never felt so empty as it did now. A short time with Jamie here and it would never be the same again. He poured a goblet of blood and sat at the piano and played with all the longing and sadness that he felt. He played Brahms, Bach, Manilow, Chopin, Rogers and Hammerstein. He played all the melodie s he knew, that expressed what he could not say in words. Natalie stepped into the room, from the lift and was stopped by the strains of music that came to her ears. The piano and vampire were merged into one to produce such heart wrenching sadness, that Natalie didn't have to ask what had happened with Jamie. She quietly walked over and sat on the couch. She leaned her head back, closed her eyes, and let the cadences wash over and through her. After a time, she began to weep for the sheer beauty of the music and sheer despair of the player. An undetermined amount of time passed, filled with songs that spanned the centuries. Nick finished with a melody she had never heard before , then closed the piano. Turning on the bench to face Natalie. "Anything going on with you?" "Jamie called me to come visit her. I'm on my way right now. Can you let me in on what happened last night?" "I told her I was the man she thought was her father. She told me she had to have time to think, then she invited me to leave." "I was listening to your music. Very moving." She blotted her eyes with a tissue. "Is there anything you want me to know?" "I didn't tell her I was her father. I told her I was the man in the pictures. I gave away as little as possible about myself, just in case..." "I see. Nick, for what it's worth; It doesn't matter if you are related or not, you two have a history together and she would be crazy to throw that away." He walked over and sat by her, taking her hand in his and holding it on his thigh. "I hope she sees it that way. If not, I'll survive." "I know you will. That's not the point." end part 12 Robbi Knightie With Dark Tendencies You must give in, you must give in. A game that you can't win, the hunger (FK CD "the Hunger") egersdor@magiclink.com A Little Taste of Happiness Part 13 by Robbi Egersdorf >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> The investigation was finished and Nick was hit with it the first thing, when he got to work the next night. "Knight, in my office.." Both men were seated, Reese behind his desk and Nick facing him. "I have made my determination and my report is right here. The jist of it says that I didn't like the way you handled yourself. You rushed in without thinking and in so doing, endangered yourself and the hostage. I also bring out the fact that you did not work as a team player in this matter. Tracy is your partner and damn it, you had her there and willing to help. I had to issue an official reprimand. It will go on your permanent record." He closed the folder and threw it on the desk in front of Nick. "Now, the regulations of this department are satisfied. Off the record. I'm glad everything turned out the way it did. If we had brought in a whole army of officers, it would have become a standoff. As it was, there was minimal injury and no loss of life. Oh, and good job on solving the Barnes' case, even though you were off it. I appreciate your hard work and dedication. Now, I think you need to book off for a few days and spend some time with your sister. I hear she's leaving the hospital in the morning." "I didn't know. She hasn't been talking to me right." "Go see her. I get the feeling that you two need each other right now, regardless of whether either of you are willing to admit it. I've got you covered for tonight. Go!" "Thanks, Cap." He was up and out the door in an instant. Joe shook his head. "That boy just needs a push in the right direction from time to time." ******************** He stood at her door, uncertain. The only reason the nurse had allowed him to visit was because Jamie had been such a night owl during her hospital stay, never sleeping during the night. It seemed logical she should receive her night visitors. At least Nick convinced the night nurse that it was. "Jamie, can I come in?" "Why wouldn't you be able to come in?" "I just thought, after the other day..." "Come in already." Nick held out a bouquet of yellow daisies. He had stopped and bought them for her on his way to the hospital. "They remind me of the sun, like you." "They're beautiful. I've always liked daisies. Thank you. I was just getting ready to call you. I've had some time to think. Natalie and I had a nice long talk early this morning. I hope you kn ow, she really cares a lot about you. Believe me. A woman knows these things. Anyway, she backed up your story 100%. She told me about our blood tests. Whew, this is going to take some getting used to." She patted her hand on the bed beside her. "Come sit by me." I don't like having to shout across the room. He complied. When he sat, she took his chin in her hand and closely examined him. "You definitely look enough like the man in my mother's pictures to be his twin brother." "To be him." Nick corrected. "Yes, to be him. My heart is just having a hard time accepting this. You're immortal. You were born at the turn of the century, the 13th century. The stories you could tell. It boggles the mind. " The words felt strange coming from her mouth. "You would be amazed at what I've seen." "I'm sure I will. You are going to tell me everything." "Well, not everything. After nearly 800 years, there's a few things I'm not so proud of." "I want to know everything about you, the good and the bad. The whole time I thought I was going to die, the most important thing that I had left undone in my life was not being able to get to know you. Not having the chance to tell you how much... I loved you." She paused as he reached over and laced his fingers with hers. "I know we've just met, but I feel there's something there, between us. Something that has kept us tied all these years. Something that won't let me walk away, no matter how bizarre the situation. Oh, I know that there's a possibility that you're not my father. Regardless of that fact; I still feel close to you. I was told you are my father, by my mother. I think that says a lot about you and how she regarded you. If it wasn't true, she wanted it to be." He smiled at her. There was nothing he could say to her. Nick leaned forward and kissed her forehead, then stroked her hair. "To me, your mother was always so innocent, so naive and yet she had seen some disturbing things as a nurse. I remember once , carrying her home from the hospital after she had been devastated by an accident in which she watched a pregnant woman die. She was carrying you at the time. She was so vulnerable..." He had to turn from Jamie as the emotions flooded him once more. The irretrievable loss of the woman and of the life that would have brought him some happiness washed over him once more. The happiness that he would never be allowed. Turning back to her , he cupped his hand to her cheek. "You have her eyes, her beautiful, laughing green eyes. She always met life with those laughing eyes wide open. She wanted to experience it all in the sunshine, even though her job kept her in the night." Tears sprung in Jamie's eyes as he stared into them. There was no escape, with him so close. "You are him. Until now, my mind wanted to believe. The way you describe her, you would have to have known her. No one could describe her so accurately. Now I know with my heart that you are him. You are Nick Forrester. You are *her* Nick." The only reply he could make was to nod his head. "Then I feel safe in giving this to you." She reached over and pulled the drawer open on her night stand. She gently handed an old shoe box to him. "I had Natalie go by my place and pick these up for me. The pictures are in there along with an unopened letter, addressed to you. I found it among my mother's things, after she had passed away. I believe it was meant only for you. I kept it in hopes that I would meet you one day." He took the letter from the box and felt of it, running a hand over the handwritten name. Bringing it up to his nose, he smelled of it. There was a faint odor of lavender to the envelope. It took him back to Stevie and the fresh, springy way she always smelled. He inhaled the fragrance and held it. Closing his eyes, he could picture her. She was wearing a spring dress with big yellow flowers on it , her belly swollen with the weight of the child she carried. Her long red hair hung loose down her back, bathed in the warm light of the moon. He opened his eyes and focused them on Jamie. He was overcome and had to turn his head from her. "I really did care for your mother. She was the sunniest person I have ever met." He turned back to her. "There is something about me that I haven't told you, dare not tell you. Suffice it to say, I would never have left your mother if it hadn't been for this problem I have. It endangered her life and yours. I could not to take that risk." "Did you give mother the chance to choose? Does this condition of your put me in danger?" "No to both questions. I couldn't tell her then, like I can't tell you now. Just telling you would put you in danger." "Natalie knows, doesn't she?" "Yes, she knows. That couldn't be helped." "All right. Guess I have to accept that for now." Absently Nick tapped the unopened envelope on his leg as he sat next to Jamie. The answer to the question that burned in his mind may be inside. Did he want to know? Did it even matter? Would Jamie mean less to him if she wasn't his daughter? Was he being foolish even thinking it was possible for him to father a child? Natalie believed it might be possible. He would have dismissed it immediately, never giving it another thought. No, that wasn't true. The question would burn in him for eternity. He had to know, yet was afraid of the answer whatever it might be. He stared at the letter and it gave no clue as to it's contents. Nick looked back at Jamie with a large smile on his face. He couldn't understand why he smiled. His stomach was in knots at that moment. "I'm scared." He whispered, barely audible to anyone. Jamie heard and understood. "Take it with you. When you are ready, then open it and read it. They are my mother's words for you. The last ones she would ever give you." end part 13 Robbi Knightie With Dark Tendencies You must give in, you must give in. A game that you can't win, the hunger (FK CD "the Hunger") egersdor@magiclink.com A Little Taste of Happiness Part 14 by Robbi Egersdorf >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Jamie had settled into Nick's loft and was now resting in her new hospital bed. He had rearranged the main floor, leaving one whole corner for her and set it up, complete with privacy curtains for her. She had been delighted to see how thoroughly he had planned her stay. "This must have cost you a fortune. I know you can't make much on your detective's salary." "I had some money put away for emergencies just like this. It's no problem, really." She took a deep breath to protest and he placed a finger to her lips. "Okay, no more arguments." He smiled at the memory as he sat at the kitchen table, staring at the stark white envelope addressed to him. Natalie; who sat beside him, squeezed his arm to remind him she was there for him. "Are you sure you're ready?" "I have to know what it says. I just have to." He looked into Natalie's warm brown eyes and knew why he loved her. "I'm glad your here." "A herd of wild elephants couldn't keep me away." "What?" "Never mind." Nick's attention went back to the envelope. He carefully tore it open and pulled out the contents. Gently, he unfolded it. He read the words that were written there by someone he had once known an d loved. Someone who was now long gone. Maybe Stevie was unreachable, physically but she was there with him in memory. He could picture her, seated across from him at the table, speaking the words of the letter to him. Nick finished and lay the letter on the table. He got up and walked a few feet across the room. Standing with his back to her, one hand in his pocket and the other to his chin. Natalie reached over and took the letter and read it aloud. "My Dearest Nicholas:" "I have missed you so, these many years. Life has been hard raising a daughter alone and working for a living. The hardest part of it all has been living alone." Nick closed his eyes tightly as an ache ran through him. "Don't blame yourself. I know you well enough to understand you had no choice." "I named her after you, just as I said I would. I hope you don't mind that I told her you were her father. Her real father was a one night stand that I had a short time before you came. I was getting older and my biological clock was telling me that time was running out for me to have children. How I wish that you had been that someone. You were everything that I wanted for her and you would have made a good father with your gently caring ways." "Don't weep for me. I have had a good life and now I am dying. I am so glad for the time that I knew you. My life has been so much richer because of what you brought to it. I love you and always will." "Your Dearest Stevie". Natalie walked over to him. "I'm sorry, Nick. I should never have built up your hopes like I did." He turned to her with crimson standing in his eyes. Taking her into his arms, he held her close. "The family I'll never have, the daughter I'll never raise. I turned my back on them." "You didn't have a choice." "I didn't have a choice. I've told myself that over and over again, but I haven't been able to accept that." "You have Jamie here and now. Make a new start with that." "I plan to." ******************** Reese's big night finally came. Jamie had insisted on attending. Nick carried her into the banquet hall against her protests. "I'm letting you come on the condition that you let me baby you." She had relented when she realized he would not go without her and she wasn't going to go if she didn't agree to his terms. Everyone from the department was there with their families. Everyone knew what had happened. News always spread like wildfire in the department. There were many a well-wisher who stopped at their table to greet them and be introduced to Nick Knight's sister. Nick looked across the table, as they sat waiting for dinner to be served. The two women in his life were the absolute most exquisite women he had seen in his entire life. He had bought Jamie a rust colored dress, just for this occasion. He had been right about how becoming it would be on her. Guess some of Janette's fashion sense had rubbed off on him after all. Natalie was dressed in black as was Nick. Dinner was chicken and pasta with vegetables. He pushed the food around his plate for a while then placed his napkin over it. "Not hungry, huh?" Jamie inquired with worry. "I'm just nervous." She nodded, knowingly. As the night passed, Nick became aware of the peaceful, happy feeling he was experiencing. "It doesn't get any better then this." He said aloud. Both Jamie and Natalie gave him a questioning stare. "I'm sitting with the two most beautiful women in the world." He reached out and took their hands and gave each a loving squeeze. "It doesn't get any better than this." Just then, Henry Sanchez came up behind Nick and whispered in his ear. "You're next." His stomach did a lurch and he took a deep breath. "You're not nervous, are you?" "Oh," he began shaking his head no, "Yes, I'm nervous." "Just do what I do. Picture everyone in their underwear." He slapped Nick on the back, laughing as he walked back up to the front. A startled look came over Nick's face, which quickly turned to irritation. "Thanks. I'll remember that." Henry introduced Nick Knight. He rose and made his way to the microphone. The sound of applause rang in his ears. "Thank you." He looked to the smiling faces of the two women at his table for support. Turning his eyes to Joe Reese, he began. "Congratulations." Then looked back at the audience. "In the past year since joining us at the 99th Precinct, Joe Reese has become on hell of a good Captain. The only problem I've seen is his arguement with the watercooler. I don't know what he ever did to it, but it sure hates him. Just last week I caught him in front of the it with a gun pointed at it, screaming 'your water or your life.' It still wouldn't give him any water. There would have been cooler parts and water all over the place if I hadn't wrestled him to the ground and ta ken his gun." Nick looked over to Joe who was laughing hysterically. "And I'm not even going to mention the goldfish incident." He thought Reese was going to fall out of his chair he was laughing so hard. Nick began again after allowing the laughter to die down. "Seriously now folks, we are here to honor the man who was there for us during a very dark time, the deaths of Captain Cohen and my good friend and partner, Don Schanke." Pausing, Nicl let out a sigh as he reflected on the loss of these two friends. "Since then, he has reigned over this precinct like a father, keeping us in line. He has shown a single-minded, dogged determination to find the truth, no matter how unlikely it turns out to be. I have overheard him on several occasions express his lack of understanding of the criminal mind, then turn around and show how much he does understand. I've grown to respect and admire his leadership, instincts and working knowledge in the field. Joe Reese is what they meant when they coined the phrase 'a good cop'. We all love ya, Cap. You deserve this honor." He turned to his Captain once again and returned his smile and shook his hand. Nick made his way back to his table. Natalie leaned over and whispered in his ear. "Pretty good for someone who couldn't come up with anything, I'd say." ********************* Epilogue - Several weeks later. "I can't believe it. I'm finally doing it. Thanks Nick, for everything you've done for me." She embraced him, giving him a kiss on the cheek. She was her old self again. So full of life. Her recovery was 100% from her gunshot wound. The Doctors had said her healing powers were far beyond that of a normal person. They had arrived at the airport in plenty of time to check her baggage and to say their finally good-byes. "Did you know that Nick helped me to apply for and get a full scholarship to the University in Boston. Without it I could never hope to do this." Natalie shot Nick a questioning look. He returned with a shrug and an innocent look. "I'm finally going to do something with my life that isn't selfish. I'm going to see if I've got what it takes to be a nurse." "Flight 119 to Boston now boarding at gate 51." The airport echoed with the tinny voice that came over the speakers. "That's me. I guess this is it." They embraced once again. He reached up and pushed the hair back from her eyes one last time. "Have a good life." "This isn't forever, you know. I love you and I'll miss you." "Me too." She turned to Natalie, who had been standing next to Nick. "And thanks for everything. You've been a good friend through all of this." The two women embraced. "You write now, you hear?" "I will." The excitement of the new adventure in her life was written all over her face. "Guess this is good bye." She picked up her carry on bags and merged with the crowd as they were boarding. Jamie disappeared through the alley that led to the airplane. All Nick could see was Stevie as she walked away from him for the last time. "I love you." He whispered so quietly that noone heard. They walked over to the window and watched the plane taxi off down the runway. It took off into the night sky carrying it's precious cargo - one daughter that almost was his. an end and a beginning Robbi Knightie With Dark Tendencies You must give in, you must give in. A game that you can't win, the hunger (FK CD "the Hunger") egersdor@magiclink.com