Subject: Picking Up the Pieces 1/6 Date: Wed, 24 Mar 2004 21:47:12 -0800 From: Kristen Fife To: FKFIC-L@LISTS.PSU.EDU OK, I didn't know this was going to evolve until it, well, did. This takes place right after my last story "A Friend In Need". If you don't have it or didn't get it, let me know and I'll forward it to you. Chronologically, this is set a couple of weeks after "Only the Lonely." Some spoilers. ====================================== Picking Up the Pieces 3/2004 Part 1 The lift rumbled to life, and Nick got up to go over and meet Natalie as she exited. She looked up at him and smiled wanly. He was dismayed to see how tired she looked, and the stress of the last two weeks was clearly etched on her lovely face. Without thinking, he took her into his arms and held her. He dropped his cheek to the softness of her hair and let the wave of tenderness her nearness caused wash over him. Natalie relaxed as soon as she felt Nick’s arms enfold her. He was her friend, her protector, and he held her heart in his hands, even though she could not tell him so. Her visit with Angela, while providing her with a much-needed change of scenery also took her away from the most important person in her life. When Nick had told her she could come over and talk if she needed, she had almost broken down in tears of relief. She had not slept in two weeks, and the after effects of almost being Roger Jameson’s next victim had shaken her to her core. As Nick held her she finally began sobbing. Terror, anger, disbelief all whirled within her. Her whole world had been shattered, because she had tried to walk away from her feelings for Nick. And the fact that he still had saved her, and actually been jealous, had only made her feelings worse. She knew that Nick would never admit feelings for her; he had told her often enough that vampires could not indulge in the comfort of love with mortals. If they did, the mortal always ended up dead or undead. She was caught in a vicious trap. Her heart belonged to Nick, and yet she knew he would never be able to return her feelings. The thought of him moving on, or her trying to start a new life, made her miserable. Add to that the fact that she had tried to deny her heart and had almost died because of it, now caused her to question her own judgment. She no longer trusted herself to make any serious decisions, and she was on the edge of a nervous breakdown because of it. Nick held her in his arms, wanting nothing more than to take away all the cares of the world from her, but knowing that he couldn’t do that. Not now. Maybe not ever. The most that he could do was be her friend, and listen, and offer what comfort he could. When Natalie started sobbing, he held her more tightly and had to fight the urge to kiss away her tears. He was trapped. She trusted him, and after what had happened with Jameson, she needed a friend to support her and give her an anchor while she tried to pull her life together. She was obviously exhausted and emotionally fragile. It shook him to see his capable and steadfast Natalie in such a state. Inwardly he snarled at not being able to rip Jameson limb from limb. Bad enough he had tried to rape and kill Nat. But the trauma was taking Natalie to the edge of a breakdown. As Natalie’s sobs finally lessened and eventually stopped, she realized how much she had needed the release of tears. And of physical contact. She sighed and started to pull away from Nick. She looked up him, and the look of caring on his face almost caused a fresh spate of tears, but she fought the urge down. “Feeling any better?” Nick’s quiet question was accompanied by a tender smoothing of an errant lock of hair off her face. “Yes. My god, I didn’t realize how badly I needed a good cry. Thanks.” She started to pull back, but Nick’s arms held her. “Nat, I…” He didn’t finish, and Natalie looked up at him expectantly. “I’m glad you’re back. I’ve been worried about you, and I missed you.” Nat leaned her forehead against his chest. She had had no idea how safe she felt when she was with Nick. Finally, she pulled back again and he loosened his grip on her, although he kept an arm around her as he led her to the couch. They sat down and he pulled her head against his shoulder. She snuggled against him, glad to be able to let someone else be strong for her, take care of her. She was so used to being the strong, dependable one. She just needed to let someone else take the burden for a while. “Nat, would you like to go upstairs and lie down?” Nick gently asked her. He could feel her exhaustion and knew she needed sleep. “I haven’t been able to sleep; I keep having nightmares whenever I start to fall asleep.” Her quiet reply brought back all the anger toward Jameson roaring back. It took him several mortal heartbeats before he could calm his beast. “Why don’t we go upstairs and I’ll just hold you. If you start to have a nightmare, I’ll wake you up. You need sleep.” Natalie lifted her head to look at him. “I don’t know what I need anymore. I don’t feel safe, I can’t seem able to make any decisions. I’m afraid I’ll do something wrong.” Her eyes were haunted as she said the last sentence. Nick lifted a finger to her chin. “It’s perfectly natural for you to feel all those things. But part of it is lack of sleep. Please. Come upstairs and try to get some rest. I promise nothing will hurt you here. You have your very own guardian vampire.” __________________________________ Do you Yahoo!? Yahoo! Finance Tax Center - File online. File on time. http://taxes.yahoo.com/filing.html Subject: Picking Up the Pieces 2/6 Date: Wed, 24 Mar 2004 21:48:40 -0800 From: Kristen Fife To: FKFIC-L@LISTS.PSU.EDU Picking Up the Pieces 3/2004 Kristen Fife Part 2 His feeble joke brought a slight smile to her lips. “I wonder how many people would be COMFORTED by that thought.” But she wearily got to her feet and started toward the staircase. Nick followed her. She started for the bedroom, but stopped and headed toward the master bath instead. Nick watched as she went into the bathroom, then went over to his bed and turned down the covers, hoping that she would be able to get some sleep. He also turned on a small lamp in the corner in case Nat was having trouble with darkness. Finally, he heard the toilet flush and the sink turn on. He turned as he heard the door open. He smiled at Nat, and took her hand to lead her to the bed. She climbed in under the covers, luckily her sweats would be comfortable for her to sleep in. “I’ll be right back, Nat. I want to change and grab something from downstairs.” Nick quietly said and she nodded. He went to the closet and grabbed a pair of sweatpants and an old t-shirt, then went downstairs to drink the last of the blood sitting on the counter. Even though he wasn’t aroused at the moment, having a mortal in his bed all day could strain his control if he didn’t slake his appetite fully before hand. Taking the bottle with him to the downstairs powder room, he shut the door and quickly downed the rest of the bottle, almost ¾ of which was still remaining. He hurriedly changed, then took the bottle back to the kitchen and deposited it in the sink. He hesitated momentarily, then grabbed another one out of the refrigerator and wrapped his jeans and shirt around it before heading back up the stairs. Nat was curled up in the middle of the bed, still awake. She looked tense and followed him with her eyes as he moved around the room, carefully depositing his clothes just inside the doorway to the closet, and pulling the bottle out of concealing garments and setting it on top of the hamper. He turned and walked over to the bed, and gingerly climbed in. He pulled the covers over himself and turned to face Natalie. ”Are you comfortable?” “Yes. I just don’t know that this will do any good.” “Are you nervous having me in the bed with you?” Nick hadn’t thought of that when he suggested it. “No, not really. I’m just having trouble going to sleep”. Nick thought for a minute, then decided that maybe distraction might work on Natalie. “Why don’t we talk? Tell me about your friend Angela. I’ve never met her, and you’ve mentioned her a few times. How do you know her? How long have you bee friends?” As Nat started telling him about her college roommate, she would pause between words more and more often. Finally, she stopped in the middle of a sentence and her eyes closed. Nick gratefully heard her heart and breathing slow down, indicating she was asleep. -Kristen Fife __________________________________ Do you Yahoo!? Yahoo! Finance Tax Center - File online. File on time. http://taxes.yahoo.com/filing.html Subject: Picking Up the Pieces 3/6 Date: Wed, 24 Mar 2004 21:50:08 -0800 From: Kristen Fife To: FKFIC-L@LISTS.PSU.EDU Picking Up the Pieces Kristen Fife, 3/2004 Part 3 He lay there watching her for several hours before allowing himself to drift off into slumber. He slept soundly for four hours until a sound woke him. He opened his eyes and immediately heard Natalie whimpering beside him. He sat up and leaned over to wake her. Her lashes were wet with tears. Shaking her, he gently called to her. “Nat, wake up. It’s just a dream.” Natalie sat bolt upright, her heart racing in fear. She had been running down a long corridor and a demon was following her, trying to kill her. She looked around her and saw Nick sitting in the bed next to her, a look of concern on his face. She fell into his arms, shaking uncontrollably. He held her and stroked her hair until her tremors ceased. After a few minutes Nick quietly asked her, “Do you want to talk about it?” She lifted her head and Nick saw the hunted look in her face. He had seen that same look over the centuries on the faces of his own prey. Seeing it on Natalie’s face caused a wave of guilt to wash through him, but he suppressed it. More than ever he wanted to rip Jameson’s throat out. “It’s always the same. I’m running down a long corridor and a monster is following me, trying to kill me. Nick, what’s happening to me? This is supposed to be over. He’s in jail.” Tears threatened her again. “Oh, Nat. You’re still dealing with the trauma of the whole experience. I know it seems as if it will never go away, but it will. I promise. I won’t let anything happen to you.” Nick pulled her back against him and gently rocked her. She finally stopped shaking, and he heard her heart slow down, but she didn’t pull away. Keeping an arm around her, he slid them both down in the bed until they were lying down, and cushioned her head on his shoulder. She curled up against him as close as she could get and finally fell back asleep. Again, he stayed awake, watching over her. His internal clock told him it was near 3 P.M. His alarm was set for 6. Natalie had at least gotten almost a full night’s sleep, although he suspected she needed several hours more. As the hours ticked by, Nick kept his vigil over Natalie. He held her close when it seemed to help her relax. He got up once to drink from the bottle he had stashed in the closet. Having Natalie so close to him, hearing her heart and smelling her blood, caused the vampire to stir. He finished the bottle and returned to the bed, smiling at the pleasant warmth resulting from having a mortal body in it. Just before six, he turned the alarm off so that it wouldn’t wake his sleeping guest. He knew Schanke would be awake by now, and decided to call his partner. He gently untwined Natalie and eased out of the bed. She murmured a few words but settled back down. Nick went silently down the steps to the phone. He dialed Schanke’s number, and Jenny picked it up on the third ring. “Hello?” “Hi Jenny, it’s Nick. Is your dad awake yet?” “Hi Uncle Nick! Yep, he’s in the kitchen. Hold on.” She covered the receiver but even so Nick could hear her call out “Dad, it’s Uncle Nick!” There was a sound of shuffling and finally Schanke picked up the phone and Jenny clicked down on the other extension. “Yeah Knight? What’s up?” Schanke was either just out of bed or still upset about Nick’s vacation. “Hi Schanke. I wanted to call and see if you thought you could handle things without me tonight. Nat called me this morning, and she’s back in town. She’s over at my place and I’m worried about her. She’s sleeping right now, and from what she said, it’s the first time she’s slept in almost two weeks.” “Oh wow. Poor kid. Yeah, stay home. If anything really important comes up, I’ll give you a call. I guess it’s a good thing you took that time off. Hey, tell Nat if she needs anything to call me. Or Myra.” Nick smiled. Schanke had a huge heart. “Will do. I’ll call Captain Stonetree and explain to him. He should be ok. Have a good night, Schank.” “You too. Give Nat a hug for us. Bye.” -Kristen Fife __________________________________ Do you Yahoo!? Yahoo! Finance Tax Center - File online. File on time. http://taxes.yahoo.com/filing.html Subject: Picking Up The Pieces 4/6 Date: Fri, 26 Mar 2004 18:02:27 -0800 From: Kristen Fife To: FKFIC-L@LISTS.PSU.EDU Kristen Fife 3/2004 Picking Up the Pieces Part 4 Nick settled the phone into the cradle. Captain Stonetree wouldn’t be in the precinct until 10 PM. He wondered if Nat might consider staying with him for a few days. If she really had been having trouble sleeping, she seemed at least able to relax enough to fall asleep at the loft. Sidney was still at Grace’s until the end of next week, and Nick had a feeling that Nat shouldn’t be alone. He also wondered if he could convince her to talk to a counselor. With his vacation time already approved, he could be there for her for anything she needed. Just then he heard her call him. “Nick?” He rushed back up the steps. She was sitting up groggily. “Sorry. I just went downstairs to call Schanke and tell him I’m not going to be in tonight. He sends his love and hugs.” He sat down on the edge of the bed. “You didn’t have to take time off on my account.” “Nat, you are more important right now. Besides, I was planning on starting a couple of weeks’ vacation after tonight’s shift anyway.” He peered at her. “How are you feeling?” “A little better, although I’m hungry.” As if on cue, her stomach rumbled. Nick laughed. “That’s a good sign. Do you want to order in or go out?” He hoped she wanted to stay in. She looked better, but still haggard. “Just order in. How about a sub or something?” “Let me get the phone book; I don’t have any clue what places deliver around here other than the pizza place and Changs.” He went downstairs and retrieved the yellow pages, and brought them along with the cordless phone back to the bedroom. He looked around, puzzled. Nat wasn’t in the bed. Then he heard the water from the bathroom. Natalie came back out and smiled at him. Together they headed back to the bed and Nick turned on the lamp. Natalie leafed through the restaurant section and finally found a place nearby that would deliver subs and salads. She called and ordered while Nick listened. Finally, she hung up the phone and stretched. “Nick, you really didn’t need to take time off of work for me. I feel loads better than I did this morning.” She was absently worrying at the duvet cover. Nick reached over and gently grabbed her hand in his. “Nat, nothing is more important than you. It has been very quiet the last few days at the Precinct, so don’t worry about it. I mean it.” He brought her hand up to his lips, and she blushed but didn’t offer any more protest. He stood up. “Don’t you want to go downstairs for a change of scenery?” She nodded and got up as well. Still holding her hand, he led her down the steps. She followed him, acting strangely…docile. It worried him that Natalie was so subdued. “Would you like me to play something for you?” Nick offered, nodding to the piano. “Really? You would?” For the first time in the last twelve hours a genuine smile of pleasure lit up her face. Nick returned the smile and walked over to the piano and seated her next to him on the bench. He considered a moment and then started playing some ragtime, hoping that the upbeat music would lift her spirits. Apparently it worked, because she was smiling still when the buzzer sounded, announcing her dinner. They moved over to the table so she could eat, and Nick poured his own “dinner.” They talked quietly between bites and sips. Nick watched as Natalie slowly seemed to unwind. She was far from her normal, confident self, but she seemed to be more comfortable. After they had put their dishes in the dishwasher, Nick went over and picked up the TV guide, hoping that there might be something on cable to distract her a bit more. He smiled when he saw that there was a Tom Hanks comedy on, starring one of Nat’s favorite actors as a cop with a dog for a partner. “Turner and Hooch” sounded light and funny. “Hey Nat, have you seen Tom Hanks in ‘Turner and Hooch’”? She wrinkled her brow. “No, it doesn’t ring a bell.” “Good, let’s watch it. It starts in 15 minutes.” She shrugged and he went to the cupboard and pulled out a bowl and some microwave popcorn. __________________________________ Do you Yahoo!? Yahoo! Finance Tax Center - File online. File on time. http://taxes.yahoo.com/filing.html Subject: Picking Up The Pieces 5/6 Date: Fri, 26 Mar 2004 18:03:37 -0800 From: Kristen Fife To: FKFIC-L@LISTS.PSU.EDU Kristen Fife 3/2004 Picking Up The Pieces Part 5 Two and a half hours later, after the movie had finished, the two of them were curled up on the leather sofa and Natalie was very close to falling asleep again. She was leaning on Nick’s shoulder and drowsing. He leaned over and kissed her gently. “Nat, you should go upstairs to bed.” “Mmmmmmmmmmm.” Nothing else. Gently, Nick moved and laid Nat down, put a pillow under her head, and covered her with a throw. He checked his watch and saw that it was just after ten. He went upstairs to call in to work. “Captain Stonetree? This is Nick Knight. I need to take a sick day or move my vacation up one night. I know it’s short notice, but I already talked to Schanke, and he said he’d call me if anything urgent comes up. Natalie is back in town, and she’s here at my place. She’s in pretty bad shape, hasn’t slept in a couple of weeks.” Stonetree sighed on the other end. Yeah, sure they were * just * friends. “OK Knight. But if we need you, you’ll have to come in.” “Thanks Captain, I really appreciate it.” Setting down the phone in relief, Nick went downstairs to check on Natalie. She was still sleeping, apparently undisturbed. He went over to the corner where his paints were and decided to work on a piece that had been trying to form in his mind for several weeks. He set up the easel, canvas, and paints and was soon lost in the creative process. Around 3 AM, Nat woke up. She looked around her, but it took her a minute to realize she was at Nick’s loft, and had fallen asleep. She looked around for him, and saw him engrossed in a painting. She sat up and her movement caught Nick’s attention. He put down his paints and walked over to her. “Doing better? You look a lot better, even than a few hours ago.” He caught her in a hug. “It’s amazing how much we take for granted that sleep is a necessary part of life. I’m still tired, but not nearly as exhausted as I was…thank you.” Nick reached down and rubbed his hand along her cheek. “So, I was thinking, would you consider staying here for a few days? Grace still has Sidney, so there shouldn’t be any reason for you not to pick up a few changes of clothing and crashing here.” “Nick, I appreciate the offer, but I feel much better…” Nick placed a finger over her lips. “Nat, you’ve slept almost 15 hours today, and you admit that you are still tired. You seem to be able to relax enough to fall asleep here, and I think you need that. And, I’ll admit it, I want to keep an eye on you. Please, let me take care of you for a few days.” He looked deeply into her still-shadowed blue eyes. Finally she sighed loudly. “OK. A few days. Maybe you’re right. But I really do need to get some more clothes and a few toiletries.” ”No problem, we’ll go over to your place. And we can stop at the grocery store to stock up on a few things for you to eat.” “Fine, let’s go then. The sooner I get my things the sooner I can get a shower. And Nick, I really appreciate your help.” They put on their coats and went down to take the caddie over to Natalie’s apartment and the grocery store. At 5 AM they pulled back into the garage, as the first rosy tints of dawn were starting to appear in the eastern sky. Nick grabbed Natalie’s small suitcase and one of the bags of groceries. Nat grabbed the other bag, and the garage door shut out the lightening sky. The rode the lift up, and Nick realized that he was tired. He hadn’t slept very well the previous day watching over Nat. He glanced over at her, and she looked ready to fall back into bed herself. As the lift rumbled to a stop and they exited, Natalie lifted the bag of groceries to the counter, and started to pull out the items that needed to be refrigerated. Nick left the second bag for her to deal with, and proceeded with her bag upstairs. Nat joined him a few minutes later, trudging wearily up the stairs. “Nat, do you want me to sleep on the couch?” She looked at him, a slight look of panic in her eyes. “No, Nick, please stay with me. I really think it makes a difference having you here with me. Please.” He reached for her hand. “I just want you to be ok. I’m happy to stay with you. Just let me know whatever you need.” Natalie brushed her teeth and went to change while Nick changed into pajamas. Nat came out wearing flannel PJ’s that caused Nick to smile. She really looked like a young, lost child. As they slid in bed, Natalie cuddled up to Nick and soon both the vampire and the mortal were asleep, content and safe from the world within each other’s arms. __________________________________ Do you Yahoo!? Yahoo! Finance Tax Center - File online. File on time. http://taxes.yahoo.com/filing.html Subject: Picking Up The Pieces 6/6 Date: Fri, 26 Mar 2004 18:10:24 -0800 From: Kristen Fife To: FKFIC-L@LISTS.PSU.EDU Kristen Fife 3/2004 Picking Up the Pieces Part 6 The next evening, Nat woke up slowly. She had slept through the night, for the first time in two weeks, and was no longer physically exhausted. There was still a small lamp gently glowing in the corner, and she could just make out Nick, fast asleep next to her. He was curled on his side facing her, and he had a small smile on his face. She hoped he was having pleasant dreams. She watched him for several minutes, enjoying the chance to study him while he slept. She memorized each line of his face in the dim light; it might be the only chance she ever got to wake up next to the man she loved. She knew that the few days she spent with him would be important to her emotional well- being. Now that she was no longer exhausted, she was able to look more clearly at her life. Her emotions, her actions and reactions, all the things she had been avoiding thinking about. Being a doctor, she KNEW that she was suffering from the trauma of her ordeal. She also knew that she needed to seek professional counseling. But, more importantly, she recognized that she needed a “break” from her life. She needed the shelter and healing that she was finding here, with Nick. Finally, she was able to understand that Nick knew the human condition better than most people could imagine. Not only had he lived his OWN life for almost eight centuries, he had watched the rest of humanity. He had seen and experienced more than any five people put together possibly could, and he knew what she needed because he HAD studied it. She had so much to be grateful for, and Nick’s caring and generosity were a precious gift. Quietly she slipped out of the bed and padded downstairs. She glanced at the clock and saw that it was 5 PM. She wandered over to the piano and remembered the music Nick had played for her and she smiled. She wanted to be quiet, because she knew Nick hadn’t gotten much sleep making sure that she DID. She looked around and saw the easel in the corner. Curiously, she wandered over to look at it; Nick had been working on it after the movie. As she walked around behind the easel, her eyes flew open wide. There on the canvas was a partially finished image. A knight in full plate armor, sword drawn, was defending a beautiful lady in a long gown from a horrible creature. It wasn’t a dragon, it was much darker and more amorphous than that. Natalie wondered if the monster was supposed to Roger Jameson or Nick’s own dark nature. The painting was a total juxtaposition. The right hand portion was very detailed and classically done, much more reminiscent of an age gone by. The monster, on the other hand, was very modernistic and contemporary. Just then she looked up to see Nick watching her from the top of the landing. He didn’t say anything but walked down the stairs and came to stand with her, gazing at the partially completed image. He put his arm around her, and she leaned against him. “So Nick, I recognize the imagery on the right. But I’m not sure of the monster on the left. Is that supposed to be Roger Jameson or something-or someone- else?” Still keeping his eyes on the canvas, he didn’t reply for several seconds. Finally, he said “I just don’t know Nat. It’s just evil; in whatever guise it lives in the world.” Without another word, he gently guided her away from the painting, and they sat down to plan what they were going to do for the next few days. Nick knew that Natalie was going to be OK when she told him that she was going to make an appointment to talk to a counselor, and that she had slept through the night. He wanted to cherish the few days that he had with her, knowing that it might be the only such time he ever got to spend with her, and praying that it was not. Natalie secretly put the image of her guardian vampire sleeping as peacefully as a child into a precious corener of her mind. He was keeping all the evil in the world at bay, if only for a few short days. A few short days that would last the rest of her life. ======================== Thanks for reading! fenix23fyre@yahoo.com __________________________________ Do you Yahoo!? Yahoo! Finance Tax Center - File online. File on time. http://taxes.yahoo.com/filing.html