Subject: Over to You (1/1) From: April French Date: Tue, 26 Aug 2003 13:24:50 -0700 To: FKFIC-L@LISTS.PSU.EDU X-UIDL: 9dd3ae6c6c5a1209905a6e47f9da2ece X-Mozilla-Status: 0001 X-Mozilla-Status2: 00000000 Return-path: Envelope-to: stephke@IGLOU.COM Delivery-date: Tue, 26 Aug 2003 16:27:32 -0400 Received: from [128.118.141.59] (helo=f05n16.cac.psu.edu) by iglou.com with esmtp (8.12.5/8.12.5) id 19rkPb-0007NT-Qq for stephke@IGLOU.COM; Tue, 26 Aug 2003 16:27:31 -0400 Received: from f05n16 (f05s16.cac.psu.edu [128.118.141.59]) by f05n16.cac.psu.edu (8.9.3p2/8.9.3) with ESMTP id QAA53388; Tue, 26 Aug 2003 16:24:54 -0400 Message-ID: <200308262024.QAA53388@f05n16.cac.psu.edu> Reply-To: April French Sender: Forever Knight TV show stories X-Foreign-Sender: 128.118.141.59 X-UIDL: 9dd3ae6c6c5a1209905a6e47f9da2ece Over to You--a Forever Knight story By April French Author's Note Since I was writing an email to Kristin when I came up with the idea for this story, it's dedicated to her. It's also the first time I've tried a story from Nick's point of view, as well as my very first foray into Immortal Beloveds territory. How'd I do? The song is 'Over to You,' by the Goo Goo Dolls, so it doesn't belong to me. Praise, comments, criticism and kudos all gleefully accepted. Nasty flames will be given to Janette to light cigarettes. This story will be archived at my site http://www.geocities.com/runeshard/fkficindex.html with all the others. Permission to archive is given to Kristin, if she wants it, and to no one else. Hey, and check out the banner Kristin made for my homepage; it's glorious! ~~~ Over to You (1/1) "'Don't try to find her,'" he warned me. "'She doesn't want to be found.'" He didn't need to tell me that. It was obvious she did not want me to track her down. It was obvious that she did not want me. Janette had left me. Again. But this time, it was truly my fault. And I didn't think about All the ways I hurt you and myself I was the reason she had left. My constant angsting and prattling... my search for mortality had driven her away. And I wouldn't say a thing to you I keep it to myself in my mind Ever since I found out she was in Toronto, I had used her and neglected her. I had gone to her for information and never given her anything in return except grief. What am I going to do now? But I can't stand without you And I won't find the answers when you're gone She was... my spirit, the buffer between me and harsh reality. Janette was a true part of me, almost a part of my physical body. A vital piece of me. But it's over to you Now I feel as though I am missing an arm, or a lung. And I can't find the answers when you're gone Does she feel the same? Perhaps. And it's over to you She has left me before. And you can't find the answers where you are She always comes back, eventually. In time... And it's over to you But when will that be? Only she can say... and I don't know that I can wait that long. And you know, I need you now And this ain't easy to admit I loved her. I was infatuated with her from the first and I was still. I wanted her, I needed her. I have loved many women, but only two have I longed for with such a deep and fierce and abiding passion. One of them, I have yet with me. But only one. And no one needs to know What goes on behind the door in my room Janette would understand, if she were here for me to tell her, what I am feeling. It is our way, to love often and widely. She even approved of Natalie! But it was something that took me centuries to understand, and Natalie has always been so jealous of Janette... I can never tell Natalie. I kick it to the wall in my mind I need her. But I can't stand without you But I need Janette, too. And I won't find the answers when you're gone I only wish that she needed me as badly. And it's over to you If only she hadn't left... If only she would come back! I wouldn't berate her, or be angry... I won't tear you down, I won't tear you down Whatever she wanted of me, I would do. Give in to the walls you want there I need her. Kick it to the walls I crave her as I crave mortality and the light of day, as she desires the freedom and the cool fires of the night. No one can believe in things that never change Immortality is a stagnant thing without her in it. The depth and suppleness, the velvet and the silk of the night, have all gone, and my nature is now not only abhorrent to me, it is bland. And it's over to you I know I will see her again. When, though, I cannot say. I only know that, no matter how many years it takes, it will be a very long eternity. But I will see her again... one day. ~Finis--August 26th, 2003~ April French daomir_darkfell@yahoo.com ~Forever Knight: The Sons of Lilith~ http://www.geocities.com/runeshard/fkficindex.html ~The Corvina~ http://www.geocities.com/runeshard/index.html "And we shall exist by amusing ourselves, by dreaming of monstrous loves and fantastic universes, by complaining and quarreling with the pretenses of the world..." --"The Flash of Lightning" by Arthur Rimbaud --------------------------------- Do you Yahoo!? Yahoo! SiteBuilder - Free, easy-to-use web site design software